PSX5Central
Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: luckee on January 09, 2002, 02:33:20 PM
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Three women had a very late night at the bar. They left in the early morning hours, and went home seperately.
They met the next day at lunch, and compared notes about who was the drunkest.
The first gal claimed that she was the drunkest. "I drove straight home, walked in the house, and as soon as I got
in, I blew chunks."
The second gal replied, "You think that was drunk? I got in my car, drove home, and put the car through the
garage door!"
The third one said, "I have you both beat. I went home and tipped over a candle and burned up my livingroom."
They all looked at each other for a moment. Finally, the first woman said, "I don\'t think you understand. Chunks is
my dog."
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Oh dear yet another BAD Joke Thread ... well here is another one !
a man walks into a doctors and ask for an examination
the doctor asks the man to drop his pants only to see what looks like a steering wheel sticking out of his boxers
the doctor asks " what the hell is that ?....."
the man replys " i don\'t know, but it\'s been driving me NUTS"
:nut: :nut: :nut:
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lol there both funny, but 00sevens thats excellent, im gonna tell it to everyone!!!!!:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:
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at 3am.. Everything is funny :laughing:
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Here\'s one, sorta a blonde joke.
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Three moms are all sitting together when they discuss their daughters\' out of control behaivors.
The red-headed mom says, "My daughter is so bad, I found a pack of cigarretes in her dresser! I didn\'t know she smoked!"
The brunnete mom rolls her eyes and says, "That ain\'t nothing, I found a bottle of vodka in my daughter\'s closet! I didn\'t know she drank!"
Then the blonde mom says, "Oh yeah!?! I found a condom in my daughter\'s bedsheets! I didn\'t know she had a penis!"
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I like this one:
A man is preparing to introduce his girlfriend to his parents over dinner. The dinner is going all fine until the girlfriend has to pass gas bad. Suddenly, after hearing a funny joke, she lets out a nice rip. The table gets quiet, and the dad looks under the table and yells, "NIBBLES!" . The girlfriend is relieved at the fact that they all thought it was the dog. Suddenly another wave of gas erupted from her sphincter. "BUUUURRRRRR!!!" The dad yelled again, "NIBBLES!!!!!" . Now the girlfriend is glad that she can release this uncomfort and the dog just gets blamed. So then she lets out one more eruption of flatuence that shakes the chandelier. And the dad screams, "NIBBLES GET THE HELL OUTTA THERE SHE\'S GONNA **** ALL OVER YOU!"
:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:
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STOP THE INSANITY!!!
her\'s mine :)
knock knock
who\'s there?
orange
orange who?
orange you glad i didn\'t say banana!!
AHAHAHAHA..HA..ermmm..
"unknown crawls back under his rock"
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(Throws rotten eggs at unknown\'s rock)
It\'s something your not supposed to do, but I crack up at my own jokes.
:laughing:
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Originally posted by Vapor Snake
(Throws rotten eggs at unknown\'s rock)
It\'s something your not supposed to do, but I crack up at my own jokes.
:laughing:
"Unknown counters by catching them in his pan and serving them up for his friends", I love laughing at my own jokes 2 :)
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Originally posted by unknown
"Unknown counters by catching them in his pan and serving them up for his friends", I love laughing at my own jokes 2 :)
:laughing: Good comeback!
(Pees on unknown\'s rock)
(Runs off with pants at ankles)
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"unknown pulls out the potato gun and shoots a sucker right up vapor\'s patooter"
BOOYA!
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(Vapor falls to the ground in tears)
I\'m telling my mommy!
:(
(Staggers away, sniffling)
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Lemme guess, this story is about girls from the Philippines! Right?
ahahahah
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A man walks into a bar with his pet money and sits down to order a drink. Immedeately, the monkey jumps off his shoulder and begins running around the bar eating all the limes, pretzles, and beernuts. Annoyed the bartender looks to man, but before he can say anything, the monkey jumps on the pool table and swallows one of the balls whole.
"Holy Shyt!" The bartender said, "Yer monkey jus ate my Cue ball!" "Yeah", the man said "The lil bastard eats everything in sight." So the man settled up the tab, finished his beer and took his monkey home.
A week later, the man and the monkey enter the bar again. As he sits down to have a drink, the monkey leaps off his shoulder and heads for a bowl of cherries. He grabs one out, sticks it up his rectrum, and then eats it.
"Oh my god", the bartender said, "Did you jus see what your monkey did this time??"
"Yeah," The man said, "Lil bastastard still eats everything in sight, but ever since that Cue ball he\'s been measuring it first."
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A penguin is driving down the road in his brand new Cadillac when all of a sudden he starts hearing some odd noises come from his engine. Not wanting to ruin his new ride, he quickly pulls over to the nearest mechanic shop to get it checked out.
"Well", the mechanic said to the penguin, "I\'m pretty busy so It\'ll take about an hour before I can take a look at it."
Spying a grocery store across the street, the penguin replied "It\'s alright, I\'ll just go over there for awhile and be back in about an hour."
So the penguin waddles across the street to the grocery store and immedeately heads to the freezer section where he begins munching down on frozen fish sticks and Ice Cream. After about an hour of gorging himself, he waddles back to the mechanic\'s shop.
The mechanic greeted him at the door. Wiping his greasy hands, he said to the penguin. "Looks to me like you just blew a seal." To which the penguin blushes and relpies.. "No.. No no.. that\'s just vanilla ice cream."
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I have some good jokes but they might offend some people. They are really funny but can really offend certain races. Sorry. Good jokes everyone :laughing:
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Originally posted by Titan
I have some good jokes but they might offend some people. They are really funny but can really offend certain races. Sorry. Good jokes everyone :laughing:
col, well make a thread ayng, caution may offend on it,!!!!
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People will probably still get offended so I don\'t want to take that risk.
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Originally posted by Titan
People will probably still get offended so I don\'t want to take that risk.
well why dont you pm a mod, ask them if you will be getting banned,if you put jokes like this in there, and give a example??!!!!!!
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or better yet, just post\'em and blame it on peer pressure.