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Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: theomen on January 14, 2003, 05:31:49 AM

Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: theomen on January 14, 2003, 05:31:49 AM: in the grand tradition of Bobo, here is a useless thread. Enjoy.

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nacs.uci.edu%2Fsupport%2Fdcs%2Fsecurity%2Ftoaster.jpeg&hash=c3f018246e0652b64163f5df9809a560eda86197) VS (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbanext.uiuc.edu%2Fgpe%2Fimages%2Fts-lettuce.jpg&hash=49418bd7852784d6d8cbd4cf74f44f43e1ac0adb)
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: ooseven on January 14, 2003, 05:35:43 AM: Winner

head of lettuce on a technicality

How ?
Well the toaster would try and eat the head of lettuce, and it would use its toasting power to toast the captured lettuce.
As a result of this the lettuce catches fire and the toaster burns and explodes.

Result ?

The head of lettuce wins because its pieces are more recognisable after the explosion
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Kurt Angle on January 14, 2003, 08:19:24 AM: Toaster would win.

The reason being it would fry the lettuce into a pile of ash.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: project86 on January 14, 2003, 09:09:17 AM: Come on guys, everybody knows that the owner of the house (or renter) would win in the end. It would all end in an electrical fire due the overload in the circuit breaker considering that the lettuce has enough water in it to cause the toaster to flame up and thus starting the kitchen on fire causing the home owner to call the fire department to put out the flames. After all is said and done the insurance company would send an idiot out to set an estimate then write a check for the damage done. Whala! The guy with the lettuce in the toaster fetish wins.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: MPTheory on January 14, 2003, 09:13:00 AM: Why is this thread in existance? what made you curious about a fight between a toaster and a head of lettuce?
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: shockwaves on January 14, 2003, 12:17:55 PM: The toaster would win. Being that heads of lettuce are not only nutoriously stupid, but also easily distracted, it would forget what it\'s doing and get distracted by the shiny surface of the toaster. Then the toaster would take it out.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: videoholic on January 14, 2003, 12:49:35 PM: Quote
Originally posted by MPTheory
Why is this thread in existance? what made you curious about a fight between a toaster and a head of lettuce?

Spammer.....

I\'d think the toaster would definitely win. It would just hang out and bore the lettuce to wilt. Then it would just rot and fade away.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: SER on January 14, 2003, 03:35:16 PM: ^^^^^^

GENIOUS! :D
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: videoholic on January 14, 2003, 03:36:19 PM: ^^^^^^^^^^^^

You\'re just saying that because I can ban you or change your name back to serrano.. :)
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: SER on January 14, 2003, 03:40:00 PM: No, because I consider myself a genious, and I thought of that way before I read your reply old man.

I AM NTO SCRARED OF YUO!!!!11
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Rick on January 14, 2003, 03:52:38 PM: It depends whether its a wet lettuce or not
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: videoholic on January 14, 2003, 04:29:44 PM: Everything is wet aroung theomen. That reminds me. I think we need to resurect a thread.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Bobs_Hardware on January 14, 2003, 04:38:09 PM: Sometimes the right answer is in front of us the whole time and we can\'t see it for the rain, or perhaps the cataracts. But there\'s no denying that the answer exists, as we can feel it, taste it. It\'s like something out of a Sherlock Homes mystery, or a Scooby Doo cartoon. The kind of question that makes you stop and think; "Hey, this could be ME.". But in the end it all comes down to what YOU think. Do YOU believe that the lettuce can beat the toaster? Or will it be pummelled into submission like the crying little bitch it pretends to be on Friday nights at the local Cabaret club. Or course this begs another question. Is Homosexuality rampant and accepted in our local fresh produce industry. or is it one big cover up in an effort to \'save\' our youth from the near infinite possibilities of pink hot pants, and flurescent green sweat shirt combinations. I know what I\'d choose. But the fact remains that the toaster has a hard metallic surface.. and lettuces (or cabbages in some circumstances, although in 43 states it is completely unacceptable) could merely grab a fork and jam it into the bread slots repeatedly, taking out both the toaster and itself in one swift, deadly, and sexy maneuver. Not only providing the world with entertainment, but giving the proprietor of the fight a healthy meal. I couldn\'t imagine a better way for the fight to end.

Could YOU?
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 14, 2003, 05:01:25 PM: Another fine post by Bobs_Hardware. Oh and by the way, Lettuce wins because it is organic, toaster is not a living object, therefore it loses.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Bobs_Hardware on January 14, 2003, 05:04:50 PM: So in a fight, I (being completely organic (with the exception of the tripple headed 5x speed didlo swinging between my legd)) would beat a 900 foot tall MACHINE OF DEATH in a FIST FIGHT purely because I\'m organic?

HELLO!?!?!?!

WELCOME TO MORON-VILLE! POPULATION YOU!! PLEASE MEET THE MAYOR OF MORON VILLE...THE HURRICANE. AND DON\'T FORGET TO WEAR SOME COMFORTABLE UNDERWEAR BECAUSE YOU ARE A MORON!!!!
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 14, 2003, 05:08:56 PM: i would just pour water on the machine and it would short circuit
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Bobs_Hardware on January 14, 2003, 05:11:47 PM: WHAT THE FUDGE!?!?!

DUUUDE!

IT\'S A [size=8]MACHINE OF DEATH[/size]. Your fanciful "water" CAN NO STOP IT!!!! NOTHING CAN!!! WE ARE ALL DOOMED YOU ****** MUNCHING PEA SOUP DRINKING OVER-EMPHASIZED WORD IN A POORLY PHRASED SENTENCE!!! HOW CAN YOU EVEN SUGGEST SUCH A STUPID THING TO SAY.

YOUR MOTHER IS A WHORE AND I\'D LIKE TO CUT A WHOLE IN HER STOMACH AND RAPE THE SEMI-DIGESTED FOOD STUFFS INSIDE..

YOU\'RE DISPICABLE!!!
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: videoholic on January 14, 2003, 05:13:06 PM: Bans Bobo for excessive use of capitalization.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 14, 2003, 05:15:44 PM: and what does this so called Machine of Death run on these days anyway???

Battery, oil, is it plugged into the wall or somehing, solar powered even???

so ole rusty stands no chance against human life.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Bobs_Hardware on January 14, 2003, 05:31:04 PM: Not against ALL of humanity, my guess is that humans would build a SECOND [size=8]MACHINE OF DEATH[/size] to counter the first one! BUT IMAGINE IF THEY CHANGED FORCES!?!?!

Quote
Originally posted by videoholic
Bans Bobo for excessive use of capitalization.

Oh yah! You\'re not taking your "I\'m an admin and can ban people joke" too far, are you? :rolleyes: I bet we\'ll never hear that one again :laughing:. Too bad though, because it\'s SO f*cking funny. Fucking idiot.

GROW SOME F*CKING BALLS.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: videoholic on January 14, 2003, 05:35:08 PM: Ah ADmin Powers!!!

Deletes Bobbos penis and bans him from sexual encounters for another 17 years.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 14, 2003, 05:58:20 PM: he\'ll be all rusty in no time
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: SER on January 14, 2003, 08:41:31 PM: Bob, you are weird. Bye.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Luke on January 14, 2003, 08:44:48 PM: god damn sometimes i love bob like a son.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: on January 15, 2003, 03:06:10 AM: DUDE YOUR SO WIERD
I HOPE I NEVER END UP LIKE YOU
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Cyrus on January 15, 2003, 08:15:12 AM: FINALLY SOMEONE WITH MY SENSE OF HUMOR THANK YOU BOBS_HARDWARE!!!
By the way just for the record I believe the toaster is just a ploy a proverbial Trojan Horse and inside that toaster are thousands of green worms who just happen to be luring the lettuce to them with the shininess of the toaster and as soon as its close enough the worms will attack spewing through the slots of the toaster like maggots from rotten meat eating the lettuce to its demise.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: The Stapler on January 15, 2003, 11:54:17 AM: The SPOON would win.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Soul Reaver on January 15, 2003, 02:15:52 PM: Both of them are f*cking ghey.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Rick on January 15, 2003, 02:58:41 PM: Is Vapor Snake gay?
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Heat on January 15, 2003, 03:02:58 PM: Toaster. I like toast and marmite.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Samwise on January 15, 2003, 03:03:29 PM: Rick, do you have to even ask? ;)
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: theomen on January 15, 2003, 04:44:33 PM: Thanks to Vids insight, I dub the toaster the winner!

Ok, now for the mid card match.

Who would win in a foot race, a Midget or a Penguin?

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rol.ru%2Fpictures%2Fmisc%2Fconsnews%2Fwee.jpg&hash=17081b42e735cfc723ab591cb4055c4dfa608d0e) VS (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nsf.gov%2Fod%2Fopp%2Fantarct%2Feas%2Fimages%2Fpenguin.gif&hash=49616c0296fcf04e7ffbad2643ed018d7abe65ef)
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 15, 2003, 04:56:43 PM: Penguin... god damn all the penguin has to do is bump into the midget and he\'ll fall down.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: (e) on January 15, 2003, 05:12:19 PM: Midget.

He can fly...

Penguins cant.
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: The Stapler on January 15, 2003, 05:15:20 PM: Quote
Originally posted by theomen
Thanks to Vids insight, I dub the toaster the winner!

Ok, now for the mid card match.

Who would win in a foot race, a Midget or a Penguin?

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rol.ru%2Fpictures%2Fmisc%2Fconsnews%2Fwee.jpg&hash=17081b42e735cfc723ab591cb4055c4dfa608d0e) VS (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nsf.gov%2Fod%2Fopp%2Fantarct%2Feas%2Fimages%2Fpenguin.gif&hash=49616c0296fcf04e7ffbad2643ed018d7abe65ef)

Did you steal that from MAN VS BEAST? :p
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: theomen on January 15, 2003, 07:45:18 PM: that\'s gonna be the first episode. Penguin vs Midget
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: Mr. Kennedy on January 15, 2003, 08:08:19 PM: hmmm... I\'ve stumbled upon something... oh yes, its none other than Bobs_Hardware\'s machine of death...

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.yesterdayland.com%2Fimages%2Fpopopedia%2Fshows%2Fsaturday%2Fsa1700.gif&hash=837944ddfb842d7ce7fccce4031867ff994bd1a9)

FEAR IT! FEAR IT!!!!!!11111uno
Title: Who would win in a fight, a toaster or a head of lettuce?
Post by: theomen on January 17, 2003, 03:51:55 AM: here\'s our main event

It will be a fatal fourway. Broccoli vs. A Bottle of water vs. Hulk Hogans Jock Strap vs. Anna Nicole Smith, in a spelling bee.

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.urbanext.uiuc.edu%2Fveggies%2Fimages%2Fbroccoli.jpg&hash=228211cadf473ef805a26876b71738e7403d527c) Vs. (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.multipureco.com%2Fimages%2Fimages%2FBottle.gif&hash=ca295415b6dfae635aaf8b39d6c4e1601b3bee13)
(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sony-sports.com%2Fprot-5.GIF&hash=ef90a330f27910f9116ae15cca42eb95c85a7390) Vs. (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.probertencyclopaedia.com%2Fj%2FAnna%2520Nicole%2520Smith.jpg&hash=354a707ba07058c99bacc1a732e8c0e321473c67)