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Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: luckee on May 15, 2003, 09:14:41 AM
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EXCERPTS FROM A DOG\'S DAILY DIARY
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVOURITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
12:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVOURITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!
5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!
5:30 pm - OH BOY! MUM! MY FAVOURITE!
6:00 pm - OH BOY! PLAYING BALL! MY FAVOURITE!
6:30 pm - OH BOY! SLEEPING IN MASTER\'S BED! MY
FAVOURITE!
EXCERPTS FROM A CAT\'S DAILY DIARY
DAY 183
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape and the mild
satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the
stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again
induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair, must try this on their
bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in attempt to
make
them aware of what I am capable of and to try to strike fear into their
hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I
was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to
MY
power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my
advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The
dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is
obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an
informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety
is
assured.
But I can wait, it is only a matter of time
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That was pretty funny the first time I read it several years ago. :)
Sorry. :)
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bah..its new to me :D
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New to me too. Very funny. Makes me realize why I hate cats.
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is this proof that
dogs = stupid
cats = teh smart!
?
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^
spammer:D
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funny. the best part was about the bird in a cage at the end
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Dogs>cats
IMO.
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I also favor dogs over cats.
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Originally posted by Soul Reaver
Dogs>cats
I concur.
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The cat one was posted before. The cat one does remind me of my cat though. He pulls all that same crap on us.
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lol. meh im a hardcore cat man. I mean i like dogs but i love cats. I guess one reason is because i grew up with one and she was older than i and lived to be about 14 or maybe a little older, (wich is pretty damn old). When she died i cried. lol. Meh, but still its not just about sofistication like some people, its .... shit... a lot. I just do. oh well.
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Cats are fun to play with. I like throwing a ball at my cat and watch him attack it. I have him sit on my lap and I move the mouse curser across the screen and watch him attack it (he jumped on the screen which was funny) and stupid stuff like that.
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Originally posted by Titan
Cats are fun to play with. I like throwing a ball at my cat and watch him attack it. I have him sit on my lap and I move the mouse curser across the screen and watch him attack it (he jumped on the screen which was funny) and stupid stuff like that.
:laughing: Yeah i used to point a laser pointer on the floor and my cat must have been like 12 and she would chase the hell out of that thing and try to scratch it like it was really something. My friends cats are really goofy too. They have really slick wood floors and when the cat runs really fast and tries to round a coner she slams into a door and just sits there for a second and then slowly walks away. :D
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Posted before.
Dogs ****ing rule over cats.
But hey pussy still rocks.
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Cats > dogs.
Dogs are so lame. But if you need a slave to do mindless things I guess it\'s ok. :)
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Everyone knows my stance on this issue....The Chizz ALWAYS Goes with the pussy. :D
I like dogs, too... but I can\'t have one since I live in an apartment.
Laser pointers are a surefire way to drive a cat insane. Make him chase it around, then make it look like it went under the couch. He\'ll sit there for hours waiting for it to come out again....
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Originally posted by Samwise
Cats > dogs.
Dogs are so lame. But if you need a slave to do mindless things I guess it\'s ok. :)
I\'ve said it before and I\'ll say it again - cats are useless. Dogs are smart and are currently being trained to smell skin cancer on humans, among other things they do for us.
Anyone ever hear of a cat guiding the blind? Never. They just wanna cuddle to you when they\'re hungry. Damn, you guys are pussy whipped. :p
And a dog will save your asses when a tree falls on you by barking for help or dragging your cat-loving ass out of danger. A cat will sit on the window sill looking at you while you die slowly, waiting for its next meal. :D
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Originally posted by Samwise
Dogs are so lame. But if you need a slave to do mindless things I guess it\'s ok. :)
:crying: :crying: :crying:
Beyouch
;)
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Originally posted by GmanJoe
A cat will sit on the window sill looking at you while you die slowly, waiting for its next meal. :D
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Cat got your tongue, luckee? :p
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:laughing: GmanJoe nailed it
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Originally posted by GmanJoe
I\'ve said it before and I\'ll say it again - cats are useless. Dogs are smart and are currently being trained to smell skin cancer on humans, among other things they do for us.
Anyone ever hear of a cat guiding the blind? Never. They just wanna cuddle to you when they\'re hungry. Damn, you guys are pussy whipped. :p
And a dog will save your asses when a tree falls on you by barking for help or dragging your cat-loving ass out of danger. A cat will sit on the window sill looking at you while you die slowly, waiting for its next meal. :D
Thats great. For myself personaly, i am not blind and do not need checking for skin cancer. I dont want some mutt slobering on me and smelling funny. I dont want to take him out 24/7 and pick up his shit. I dont want to hear its barking and i can protect myself. Soooo for me a cat suits me perfectly. Cats are cuter and not as annoying and rambunctious as dogs. I can let my cat outside whenever it wants and it will come back to the house and get rid of rats bugs etc. They clean themselves much better than dogs and i dont have to carry a pooper scooper to pick up cat shit outside. They can be very friendly and not so friendly to others and their claws hurt like shit after about a minute. Cats, to ME, far outclass dogs for somebody like myself who doesnt feel like putting up with the shit (no pun intended) i get with dogs.
On a lighter note. i dont hate dogs, i just preffer cats ;)
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You\'re just lazy. :D
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Cats are ****ing retarded. I mean take a dog- loyal to the end.
A cat? Loyal until you run out of Friskies. Shit dude- my cat is a bitch. Yet my dog- it ****ing rules sitting their watching the TV with me and licking its crotch.
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Dogs are more useful. You could dog sled (which I want to make a hobby when I get older), they are good for hunting (not to be hunted ;) ), they are fun to play with. Cats just plop themselves on a heater and sleep. What are they good for? A mouse trap otherwise they are lazy.
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Meh, stereotypes. My cats have never been lazy except for one because she was really old and no Gman im not lazy. Im the kind of person that likes to wake up early, say about 5:00 am or so. Dogs are mindlessly loyal. How do you figure cats are not? Mine are so i dont know what your talking about. Maybe your cat is the kind that is hefty and doesnt get any exorcise spudz. Either that or you dont treat it like you like it. Not saying that you do. Dogs are the typical male companion. Most kids like dogs. For what i get out of many dogs its not worth the effort. I like some dogs and many of my family members have kool dogs. Its just that i simply prefer cats. Its not even really a debatable topic because i guess it depends on the person. Plus, dogs can often be used for the wrong thigs and will stupidly obey. Sure they dont know better but i just dont see in them what i see in cats. Plus it would be kooler to me to have a tiger or leopard than a wolf. meh
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Stereotypes?
:laughing:
Plus it would be kooler to me to have a tiger or leopard than a wolf.
[size=10]LMFAO[/size]
Dear God- how old are you 10?
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Originally posted by Spudz
Stereotypes?
:laughing:
[size=10]LMFAO[/size]
Dear God- how old are you 10?
Please. I dont see what rational you have behind yourstatements. Yes stereotypes you moron. As in cats are always lazy and they have no loyalty etc etc. Not all cats are like that obviously. And i was reffering to the cat and dog family when making the tiger comment. And no im far from ten. Think about it. If the money was readily available, if you could raise either a tiger or a wolf as a pet id would choose the tiger. The comment was not mindless my friend. obviously you must be the ten year old. ;)
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I asked you a question- how old are you Mr. Lions, Tigers and bears.
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Old enough to leagaly drive smoke and all that good stuff (well in the us at least). Why does it matter to you? I dont know what your getting at. And what if i was 10? would it make any difference about the matter at hand? I doubt it. Its a matter of opinion whether youre 21 12 or 45. Care to answer your own question? sice it matters so much to you.
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Cats ARE lazy. What the hell are you talking about? They SLEEP 20 hours a day on average!
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Ever pick up a cat and spin it around in circles? Its funny watching them run into walls :D
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Originally posted by Titan
Ever pick up a cat and spin it around in circles? Its funny watching them run into walls :D
LOL. never tried. i never thought of animals getting dizzy. :laughing: Well Gman my cat and my friends cats arent lazy. I guess they are super cats huh? They like to go outside a lot. But when they do sleep its cute.
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Well Gman my cat and my friends cats arent lazy. I guess they are super cats huh?
Felines are just lazy things. Its natural- dont go thinking you have a godlike cat that can defy the laws of tiredness or something.
Im guessing thats the only pussy\'s youve seen. Your friends and your own?
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Originally posted by Spudz
Felines are just lazy things. Its natural- dont go thinking you have a godlike cat that can defy the laws of tiredness or something.
Im guessing thats the only pussy\'s youve seen. Your friends and your own?
Ha ha. Your quite the creative one? You think of that all by yourself?
Well i dont know what to tell you cause they are outside a lot and they dont sleep outside. Wether they are lazy or not i could care less. The fact of the matter is that I like cats more just like you like dogs more. Its as simple as that. No need for "pussy" comments. Im sure youve seen plenty of pussy in your day, nice and furry.
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Hmm Spudz, what\'s up with all the hate recently? Seems all you do now is bitch and moan. :confused:
BTW, dogs are the most retarded animals on the planet. Sure they make for exellent slaves but that\'s besides the point. ;)
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Hmm Spudz, what\'s up with all the hate recently? Seems all you do now is bitch and moan
Just blowing out my anger on something I can do- I get in trouble for breaking shit- Its just been a hard time with me lately, and I\'m being irratitable.
Dont worry- I wont stay like this. Its over now. It being my parents divorce, it was finalized and finished like 2 days ago.
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Originally posted by Spudz
Just blowing out my anger on something I can do- I get in trouble for breaking shit- Its just been a hard time with me lately, and I\'m being irratitable.
Dont worry- I wont stay like this. Its over now. It being my parents divorce, it was finalized and finished like 2 days ago.
Sorry to hear. My parents are too but i guess its just not the same because ive been dealing with it since i was 5 (which isnt as bad). Well i hope this passes more peacefully than bad.
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Originally posted by Samwise
BTW, dogs are the most retarded animals on the planet. Sure they make for exellent slaves but that\'s besides the point. ;)
Cat owners worship their cats as if they\'re gods.
Dogs worship its owners as if we\'re gods.
Therefore, dog owners are smarter than cat owners. :p
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Dogs rule and cats drool that\'s my opinion and my opnion is fact.
So all you cat people up yours!!!
:p
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Actually I have neither cats nor dogs. I hate being dependent on those lowly creatures. I mean, you can\'t go anywhere without them getting food and whatnot, and they shit and piss on your stuff, barf on the carpet, tear your house apart and bark when you\'re trying to sleep. :p
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without them getting food and whatnot, and they shit and piss on your stuff, barf on the carpet, tear your house apart and bark when you\'re trying to sleep.
Thought you were talking about children for a second. :laughing:
Poor video.
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I prefer cats. Cat\'s clean themselves and don\'t bug me twenty four hours a day. I don\'t need an animal that just wants to sit next to me or on me. My cat comes and goes as he wants (though he never goes outside). Sometimes he\'ll jump up on my bed and sleep with me and other times, if I go to pet him, he walks away. He is indepent, which is what I like.
Now we also have a dog - a chiuaha (or wtf ever). He is pretty cool - but very needy. He is constantly wanting to be petted, or licking on you. Sometimes it gets old.
On that note : The only true cool dogs are german shepards. They are the shit. I was raised with one and she was the greatest member of my family (yes, I considered her a member of the family). She was loyal , smart and independant.
R.I.P Jezzebell!
:(
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Originally posted by Living-In-Clip
I prefer cats. Cat\'s clean themselves and don\'t bug me twenty four hours a day. I don\'t need an animal that just wants to sit next to me or on me. My cat comes and goes as he wants (though he never goes outside). Sometimes he\'ll jump up on my bed and sleep with me and other times, if I go to pet him, he walks away. He is indepent, which is what I like.
Now we also have a dog - a chiuaha (or wtf ever). He is pretty cool - but very needy. He is constantly wanting to be petted, or licking on you. Sometimes it gets old.
On that note : The only true cool dogs are german shepards. They are the shit. I was raised with one and she was the greatest member of my family (yes, I considered her a member of the family). She was loyal , smart and independant.
R.I.P Jezzebell!
:(
Thank you. You speak my point exactly. Cats are just kool like that but i guess some people like slaves. I only hope that seeing eye dogs are treated with the most kindness possible. Man\'s best friend. Pshhh. More like man\'s best slave or girlfriend. We love them when they give us attencion and hate them when they start to want things. :D j/k. See german sheppards are F*ing awesome. My good friend had one named buddy when we were kids and to us he was huge. When we got older buddy was really droopy lookin cause his hair became long and faded and drooped like a weaping willow tree. Not only that but he was tiny after we got older. Still cute though. I miss buddy.
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Cats get attached to your house, a dog gets attached to you! nuff said! (imho) :eek:
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Originally posted by Lord Nicon
Thank you. You speak my point exactly. Cats are just kool like that but i guess some people like slaves. I only hope that seeing eye dogs are treated with the most kindness possible. Man\'s best friend. Pshhh. More like man\'s best slave or girlfriend. We love them when they give us attencion and hate them when they start to want things. :D j/k. See german sheppards are F*ing awesome. My good friend had one named buddy when we were kids and to us he was huge. When we got older buddy was really droopy lookin cause his hair became long and faded and drooped like a weaping willow tree. Not only that but he was tiny after we got older. Still cute though. I miss buddy.
Slaves? You\'ve certainly trivialized the word.
I hope this happens to your cat.
http://ih8ufkr.com/humor/nokia.avi
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Originally posted by GmanJoe
Slaves? You\'ve certainly trivialized the word.
I hope this happens to your cat.
http://ih8ufkr.com/humor/nokia.avi
LOL:laughing: . Thats hilarious. Sadly it could never happen to my cat. Celings are too high. :p
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Originally posted by Lord Nicon
LOL:laughing: . Thats hilarious. Sadly it could never happen to my cat. Celings are too high. :p
Make it happen. :p