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Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: GmanJoe on June 21, 2003, 08:28:07 PM

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: GmanJoe on June 21, 2003, 08:28:07 PM

http://strongbad.surrealistic.net/ejaculator.php

Quote

You have made 97.5 gallons and 813.67689 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 10.4 football fields!
You have killed approximately 6,739,200,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 37440 kittens.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FatalXception on June 22, 2003, 12:01:18 AM

Yours... doesn\'t seem ....  possible.

Title: Re: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Samwise on June 22, 2003, 12:43:41 AM

Quote

Originally posted by GmanJoe
You have killed 37440 kittens.

So you have been yanking it about 5 times a day all your life (well, since being able to ejaculate)? You sir, are one hell of a masturbator. :D

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Kimahri on June 22, 2003, 12:48:28 AM

are these lifetime stats?

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Kurt Angle on June 22, 2003, 01:53:00 AM

You have made 33.515625 gallons and 279.7014309375 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 2.3833333333333 football fields!
You have killed approximately 1,544,400,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 8580 kittens.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: GmanJoe on June 22, 2003, 04:25:40 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Kimahri
are these lifetime stats?

I certainly HOPE SO! :eek:

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: GmanJoe on June 22, 2003, 04:28:03 AM

Quote

Originally posted by FatalXception
Yours... doesn\'t seem ....  possible.

I messed up in the jerkin\' Years. :p

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Titan on June 22, 2003, 06:06:48 PM

Quote

You have made 270291.9375 gallons and 2255695.4163802 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 14415.57 football fields!
You have killed approximately 9,341,289,360,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 51896052 kittens.

Thats the max, 999 times a week 999 years. :)

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 22, 2003, 06:33:53 PM

God, I\'m a loser.  I haven\'t even made a touchdown yet.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Bozco on June 22, 2003, 11:00:28 PM

You guys have no lives, I barely got a first down.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Living-In-Clip on June 22, 2003, 11:41:57 PM

You have made 24.375 gallons and 203.4192225 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 1.7333333333333 football fields!
You have killed approximately 1,123,200,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 6240 kittens.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Jumpman on June 23, 2003, 04:07:13 AM

You have made 2.84375 gallons and 23.732242625 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech 20.222222222222 yards.
You have killed approximately 131,040,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 728 kittens.

Poop, I\'m such a newb. :(

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: ooseven on June 23, 2003, 04:09:48 AM

You have made 81.25 gallons and 678.064075 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 4.3333333333333 football fields!
You have killed approximately 2,808,000,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 15600 kittens.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 05:10:28 AM

Jumpman and I play the short game.  We go for short yardage and first downs.

You guys all play the game like a 2 minute drill.  Throwing long bombs all the time.

It\'s a finesse game people.  Take it easy.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Tyrant on June 23, 2003, 06:02:59 AM

You have made 6.6354166666667 gallons and 55.375232791667 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech 70.777777777778 yards.
You have killed approximately 458,640,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 2548 kittens.
=============================================
theirs alot of ejaculating going on here ;).

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: ooseven on June 23, 2003, 06:11:10 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Tyrant

theirs alot of ejaculating going on here ;).

well in looking at the figures I am bewildered that we haven’t all drowned in a world wide tide of Gizz.

eeeeooooooowwww did i real type that :(.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 06:13:24 AM

You have made 4.3333333333333 gallons and 36.163417333333 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech 23.111111111111 yards.
You have killed approximately 149,760,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 832 kittens.

how do they know all this?
those scientists must go through hours of Porn!
so come on...own up...whos been spying on me?
:laughing:

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 06:16:29 AM

Tyrant and Fifa are now on my team of dink and dunkers.  It\'s all in the first downs people. Finally added up we score a touchdown.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: ooseven on June 23, 2003, 06:22:57 AM

Quote

Originally posted by FifaSeriesFan

so come on...own up...whos been spying on me?
:laughing:

:sconf: :sconf: I don\'t know what you mean... as if I....... sorry someone would spy on you yanking your plank.
:sconf: :sconf:

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 06:24:16 AM

hey video...why haven\'t you posted your results?

don\'t tell me all those attempts have come (no pun intended) to nothing?

go on,post your results and lets have a laugh about it.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 06:26:27 AM

I think it was like 27 yards or something.  I forget.  Let me go do it again..


_________________
You have made 2.1666666666667 gallons and 18.081708666667 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech 23.111111111111 yards.
You have killed approximately 149,760,000,000 little swimmers.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: ooseven on June 23, 2003, 06:32:05 AM

Oh dear someone get the PSX2Central tranquilliser and air soft sniper rifle  


Fifa is having one of his funny turns again.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 06:34:15 AM

:laughing: ooseven what I meant was how can they get that statistic from me spanking the monkey? someone must have been watching!

Don\'t shoot me,I\'m ok just need my medication.

So I guess you guys don\'t give a sh*t about discussing masturbation with other guys then?

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: JBean on June 23, 2003, 06:37:27 AM

You have made 13.203125 gallons and 110.1854121875 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech 93.888888888889 yards.
You have killed approximately 608,400,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 3380 kittens.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: ooseven on June 23, 2003, 06:38:00 AM

look its simple

they could get a group of guys and get the to crack one off :o Oooohhhhherrrrr

then they measure and weight the "deposit" ;) Firrraaarrrrrrrrr

then they just average the reults to get the average amount of Gizz produced.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 07:40:35 AM

JBean is another member of the NON Touchdown club.  

Welcome my brother.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 07:52:30 AM

video...are you sure that you should be proud of "not" scoring highly?

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: JBean on June 23, 2003, 07:55:05 AM

ah, such an elite club

nice to be a member

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 07:59:18 AM

I thought this was based on jerking it.  It\'s wasted swimmers.  Not when you are porking a chick.  If it\'s porking a chick then I need to seriously retabulate.  I never thought of porking a chick as wasting swimmers.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: JBean on June 23, 2003, 08:08:40 AM

I only counted the many times of spanking it

not how many "kids" i\'ve lost f\'ing chicks

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 08:13:42 AM

thats what I meant video...I didn\'t mean scoring as in getting a chick to open her legs for you,I meant scoring low on that masturbation chart.

Apparently jerkin the gherkin at least 2 times a day is good for you...and no my doctor never told me that lol :laughing:

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 08:19:48 AM

I don\'t have time to jerk it daily.  I only shower once every 4th day.  I can\'t afford fresh water.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: FifaSeriesFan on June 23, 2003, 08:38:26 AM

I\'m proud to be a member of the team...

videoholic is the new owner of the WWF - World W*nking Federation.

Never mind the Hardore belt!I want to be the Hardcore PORN champion lol

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Lord Nicon on June 23, 2003, 09:42:20 AM

You have made 42.65625 gallons and 355.983639375 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 3.0333333333333 football fields!
You have killed approximately 1,965,600,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 10920 kittens.

Maybe something like this. I guess it depends on how old you are too. sick bastards we be. :laughing:

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Kurt Angle on June 23, 2003, 09:50:38 AM

Anyone ever suffer from wanker\'s cramp?

Just wondering.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: videoholic on June 23, 2003, 11:07:02 AM

I would be the World NON-Wanking Federation compared to everyone else here.

Title: I am a killer. A kitten killer.
Post by: Hawke on June 24, 2003, 12:41:02 AM

You have made 17.0625 gallons  and 142.39345575 lbs. of Jizz, Congrats!
If you lined up your ejaculations in 1 inch pools end to end it would strech the length of 1.2133333333333 football fields!
You have killed approximately 786,240,000,000 little swimmers.
You have killed 4368 kittens.

My wrist hurts...