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Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: GmanJoe on December 04, 2006, 04:18:17 PM

Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 04, 2006, 04:18:17 PM
from a video. A porn video.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2191192
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 04, 2006, 04:20:06 PM
here\'s the quote:

And to think he whacked off to her! BWAHAHAHAHA!


Quote
I went to visit my parents this year for Thanksgiving, pretty typical American style holiday excursion. I packed up my wife and the twins and headed out Wednesday night on a five hour trip back to the place where I grew up. Needless to say, by the time we got to my parents\' house, we were all pretty exhausted. My wife and I unpacked the car, and as she put the kids to bed, my dad came up to me.

"Son, we need to talk. Tomorrow for dinner we\'re going to be having someone else over."

Well, yeah, duh, my sister and her fiance, right? Well, yeah, them plus someone else.

My father sat me down and went on to explain to me that my sister, my other sister, was coming to visit.

But wait, I didn\'t have another sister?

Wrong.


Turns out my father had an affair when I was really young and I have a half sister I never knew about. OK, I was pissed, sure, but this needed time to process plus I was exhausted from working all day and then driving with 2 crying babies for 5 hours. I hit the bedstack and tried to sleep. I figured I could deal with this in the morning.

Well I woke up and talked to my wife about the whole thing as well as my mom. They both seemed relatively understanding considering my parents were separated at the time and the 25 years that have passed have sort of dulled the hurt of old wounds. Plus, as it turns out, my mom had another boyfriend at the time as well (!!!). How the fuck did happen and me not know about it for 25 years?

Well my dad went to pick up my new half sister at the airport Thursday morning, and we all tired our best to get ready and be calm. My brother in law to be was acting like a douche, so that helped take my mind of the impending scenario. I was never so grateful to see that asshole.

Anyway, my dad comes in with my half sister, and my jaw fucking dropped. I recognized her. It was Kacey.

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcontent.imagesocket.com%2Fimages%2Fbig16ec.jpg&hash=1ccb1aba7bf979666bad359e54af9950cbfdb882)

My half sister is a porn star/nasty slut/former subject of my jerk off fantasies. Needless to say, I think she realized I recognized her, and dinner was SUPER awkward. She didn\'t really say anything to me about THAT, and I tried to avoid any subject which may lead in any way shape or form to anything vaguely relating to sex.

I woke up this morning, packed up my kids and wife and drove straight home. I explained to my wife in the car on the way home and she understands why I was skeeved. I apologized to my parents that I had to leave, but pretended that I had an emergency call from work and had to go. I didn\'t want to tell them that I had see my sister suck 8 dicks at once or that I had pulled my pud thinking of the idea.

I don\'t know how the hell I am going to talk to my parents now without thinking about my half sister, and not really in a sexy way either. I am pretty confused/angry/agitated right now and I think the shock is subsiding and the other emotions are flooding in. I don\'t really know what to do. Any advice?
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 04, 2006, 04:34:40 PM
Hahahaha. She is pretty hot though.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: fre4d4 on December 04, 2006, 04:51:06 PM
I could not even imagine having a half sister like that woah
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Viper_Fujax on December 04, 2006, 05:04:51 PM
pretty hilarious if its true. I need to see a family picture..

and a money shot picture........


anyway, the dude\'s a hypocrite
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 04, 2006, 06:09:39 PM
How\'s he a hypocrite?
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Viper_Fujax on December 04, 2006, 06:21:47 PM
i was gunna explain it in the post but then it turned all long on conviluted...

something about him being pissed that his half sister, who he didnt even know existed, was in porn. But before that it was alright. Could understand being pissed if it was you\'re actual sister..but this is just some chick he happens to be related to and didnt even know about.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 04, 2006, 06:34:07 PM
Thats one fucked up story. Not just his half sister. But his parents too


Quote from: Titan
Hahahaha. She is pretty hot though.

Hot? She looks mediocre to me
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Blade on December 04, 2006, 07:11:15 PM
I\'ve always liked BangBros.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: shockwaves on December 04, 2006, 07:14:41 PM
Quote from: Viper_Fujax
i was gunna explain it in the post but then it turned all long on conviluted...

something about him being pissed that his half sister, who he didnt even know existed, was in porn. But before that it was alright. Could understand being pissed if it was you\'re actual sister..but this is just some chick he happens to be related to and didnt even know about.


I think he just feels weird knowing he jacked it to someone he\'s related to.  Nothing wrong with that.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 04, 2006, 09:01:11 PM
Quote from: Blade
I\'ve always liked BangBros.

I have a lot of their stuff. They\'re pretty good. They get some sweet chicks on their porns. I have some videos by Naughty America which are decent. I mean they get the job done.

Quote from: Unicron!
Hot? She looks mediocre to me

That\'s because you\'re gay.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Evi on December 04, 2006, 11:31:02 PM
^^

She doesn\'t look that great, no.


Quote
I have a lot of their stuff. They\'re pretty good. They get some sweet chicks on their porns. I have some videos by Naughty America which are decent. I mean they get the job done.
You really need a girflriend. You always talk about how you hang out with "hot chicks" that "hit on you", but you never seem to do anything about it.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Cerberus on December 05, 2006, 01:35:07 AM
it never ceases to amaze me how these things do the rounds, I have seen the same thread on about 4 completely different forums in the last 12 hours or so.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Samwise on December 05, 2006, 02:42:38 AM
Quote from: Cerberus
it never ceases to amaze me how these things do the rounds, I have seen the same thread on about 4 completely different forums in the last 12 hours or so.

Pfft, I read it at the source. ;)

But yeah, most of the stuff posted on forums originate from somewhere else.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 03:24:50 AM
Quote from: Titan

That\'s because you\'re gay.
Nah. I just have higher standards ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 05:08:17 AM
Quote from: Unicron!
Nah. I just have higher standards ;)


Goats are not higher standards. But in your little island, Mr Borat, goats are. ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 05:14:41 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Goats are not higher standards. But in your little island, Mr Borat, goats are. ;)

Thats because I ment women.
;)
 But you have this obsession with goats and you always mention them
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 05:26:28 AM
Quote from: Unicron!
Thats because I ment women.
;)
 But you have this obsession with goats and you always mention them


Suuuuuuure you like women. *wink wink nudge nudge*

Goats dressed like women. I know how it is in your culture. You goat raping rapist! :p
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 05, 2006, 05:45:54 AM
Quote from: Evi
^^

She doesn\'t look that great, no.

So. You still wouldn\'t turn that down though.

Quote
You really need a girflriend. You always talk about how you hang out with "hot chicks" that "hit on you", but you never seem to do anything about it.

I\'m not looking for a girlfriend. I\'m content with the couple steady hookups I have.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: clips on December 05, 2006, 05:54:51 AM
Quote from: Viper_Fujax
i was gunna explain it in the post but then it turned all long on conviluted...

something about him being pissed that his half sister, who he didnt even know existed, was in porn. But before that it was alright. Could understand being pissed if it was you\'re actual sister..but this is just some chick he happens to be related to and didnt even know about.


yea i gotta agree, and she\'s aight, nowhere near hot. Only way he really needs to be upset is if he was twistin\' her out, then he found out she was his half sister, but him just jerking off to her? he should only be enbarrassed at the very most. Nothing to pack up and take your whole family back  home over. Not unless he really had some type of fascination with her.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 05:55:54 AM
Quote from: clips
yea i gotta agree, and she\'s aight, nowhere near hot. Only way he really needs to be upset is if he was twistin\' her out, then he found out she was his half sister, but him just jerking off to her? he should only be enbarrassed at the very most. Nothing to pack up and take your whole family back  home over. Not unless he really had some type of fascination with her.


So.....It\'s like that with your family, eh? You inbred. :p
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Cerberus on December 05, 2006, 05:56:29 AM
Quote from: Titan
I\'m not looking for a girlfriend. I\'m content with the couple steady hookups I have.

these couple of "steady hookups" wouldn\'t be called L.Hand & R.Hand by any chance, would they?
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 05, 2006, 05:59:38 AM
Quote from: Cerberus
these couple of "steady hookups" wouldn\'t be called L.Hand & R.Hand by any chance, would they?


Only when they\'re going through their periods ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 08:26:03 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Suuuuuuure you like women. *wink wink nudge nudge*

Goats dressed like women. I know how it is in your culture. You goat raping rapist! :p


Seems you know from first hand experience ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 08:30:32 AM
Quote from: Unicron!
Seems you know from first hand experience ;)


Don\'t be shy. We know you have goat legs and a human torso. We understand why you sex with goats.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: CHIZZY on December 05, 2006, 08:33:57 AM
When I was a young\'n (17-18)  My GF\'s best friend was this smokin\' hot 16 yr-old who was always hittin on me...well I had heard from a mutual friend that she was into internet porn... I stumbled across a video last month that has her in it doing 2 other chicks...somehow it\'s super hot to see a chick you know getting banged with a strap-on while she\'s snackin\' on tuna....
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 05, 2006, 09:16:48 AM
Quote from: CHIZZY
When I was a young\'n (17-18)  My GF\'s best friend was this smokin\' hot 16 yr-old who was always hittin on me...well I had heard from a mutual friend that she was into internet porn... I stumbled across a video last month that has her in it doing 2 other chicks...somehow it\'s super hot to see a chick you know getting banged with a strap-on while she\'s snackin\' on tuna....


Yeah but not if your a half brother tot he girl you don\'t think its hot.

Chizz, I think i might be able to top that. Apparently one of the young gym teachers in my high school was into internet porn and a friend of mine stumbled on her video. He wouldn\'t send it to me though which casts doubt on whether he actually is full of shit or not. She was a hottie so I like to think she was in it ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 09:23:26 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Don\'t be shy. We know you have goat legs and a human torso. We understand why you sex with goats.

I think you are confusing me with him

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmembers.tripod.com%2F%7Etiki_21%2Fdisney2%2Fphil.gif&hash=d49e3eba2980c2784d07df7384ae858547f9b278)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 05, 2006, 09:40:08 AM
I thought he sexed goats because no girl or guy wants him and he got turned on by the dirty goats.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Evi on December 05, 2006, 09:46:05 AM
Quote from: TITan
So. You still wouldn\'t turn that down though.
Probably not, no.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: CHIZZY on December 05, 2006, 09:53:01 AM
Quote from: Unicron!
I think you are confusing me with him

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmembers.tripod.com%2F%7Etiki_21%2Fdisney2%2Fphil.gif&hash=d49e3eba2980c2784d07df7384ae858547f9b278)


TRIPOD!?!?!

I heard you\'re hung like a hamster.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 10:10:41 AM
Quote from: Unicron!
I think you are confusing me with him

(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmembers.tripod.com%2F%7Etiki_21%2Fdisney2%2Fphil.gif&hash=d49e3eba2980c2784d07df7384ae858547f9b278)


You\'re living in denial. You are an offspring of a goat and a human goat raping rapist.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 10:46:03 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
You\'re living in denial. You are an offspring of a goat and a human goat raping rapist.
Noooo.

You just want me to look like that because it turns you on.

Sorry but I cant satisfy your perverted fantasies. ;)

Quote from: Titan
I thought he sexed goats because no girl or guy wants him and he got turned on by the dirty goats.

Actually Gman had sex with goats because I rejected him.

Quote from: CHIZZY
TRIPOD!?!?!

I heard you\'re hung like a hamster.

They hung hamsters???  :eek:
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 10:57:45 AM
Quote from: Unicron!



They hung hamsters???  :eek:


Chizzy is saying that you have a hamster penis.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 11:51:03 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Chizzy is saying that you have a hamster penis.


But I never showed him my penis thats why he thinks that.

Wait a sec.....I know why you sai dthat. You people are provoking me to post a real size pic of my penis :eek:

PERVERTS!!
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 12:03:32 PM
According the the goats you\'ve raped, they say that you hump a lot...but there is no penetration. It\'s your tongue and fist that bothers them.

You have a weird culture.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 12:16:22 PM
I cant believe you are still provoking me to show you my dick :eek:
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: fre4d4 on December 05, 2006, 12:28:24 PM
Just use your imagination guys. Jeesh, i dissapear for a month or so and the whole dam forum goes to hell
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 05, 2006, 12:37:08 PM
Quote from: fre4d4
Just use your imagination guys. Jeesh, i dissapear for a month or so and the whole dam forum goes to hell


You know why he goes by Unic? Coz he\'s a eunuch.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eunuch
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 05, 2006, 12:40:09 PM
Wb. And Take These Pervs Away From Meeeee!!!
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Joker on December 05, 2006, 04:36:30 PM
I\'d still hit it.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 05, 2006, 09:01:32 PM
Quote from: Unicron!
I cant believe you are still provoking me to show you my dick :eek:


Why not? We all could use a good laugh :shy:
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Samwise on December 06, 2006, 01:17:25 AM
I\'d hit it too. And you all would, no doubt about it.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 06, 2006, 06:29:17 AM
Quote from: Samwise
I\'d hit it too. And you all would, no doubt about it.


Not if she\'s your sister....unless that\'s what hobbits are into.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Joker on December 06, 2006, 11:11:35 AM
Quote from: Samwise
I\'d hit it too. And you all would, no doubt about it.


If the family doesn\'t know...Blackmail her for sex!
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 06, 2006, 01:20:28 PM
Quote from: Titan
Why not? We all could use a good laugh :shy:

Yeah thats what you call it now ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 06, 2006, 05:11:24 PM
Quote from: Unicron!
Yeah thats what you call it now ;)


I have no interest in your penis. I heard Cypriots have small penises and wide assholes so what do you have to offer? :running:
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Unicron! on December 06, 2006, 06:45:26 PM
Quote from: Titan
I have no interest in your penis. I heard Cypriots have small penises and wide assholes so what do you have to offer? :running:

But you have lots of interest. Thats why you are still provoking me for a picture. We are meditteranean people. We are ment to have big penises and brownish skin. ;)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: mjps21983 on December 07, 2006, 06:54:51 AM
My old boss did porn under the name azalea lee, I was looking through one day didn\'t recognize her, but the voice and then it did a close up and I was like OMFG, crazy shit considering she was both mine and my soon to be wife\'s boss. She said she made mad money from it though, so I guess more power to her.
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Cerberus on December 07, 2006, 07:14:24 AM
titan getting owned by uni!!!

who\'d have thunk it?

:D
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: GmanJoe on December 07, 2006, 08:07:18 AM
Quote from: Cerberus
titan getting owned by uni!!!

who\'d have thunk it?

:D


Titan may be gay....but he\'s no goat rapist. :p
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Cerberus on December 07, 2006, 08:26:12 AM
true, I have to admit that.

he\'ll take a choad for the team, but he\'s no goat rapist.

:)
Title: So you meet your half-sister you didn\'t know about. But you recognize her....
Post by: Titan on December 08, 2006, 08:42:47 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Titan may be gay....but he\'s no goat rapist. :p

Exactly. I\'m more of a sheep person anyway. All that wool while I\'m pushing really turns me on.