PSX5Central
Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: Paul2 on February 29, 2008, 11:14:25 PM
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A man was in his front yard mowing grasses when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Obviously angry, back into the house she went, stomping her feet.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is!!!"
(are you ready? ... this is a beauty ... scroll down...)
My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU\'VE GOT MAIL."
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It would work better without the unnecessary build-up.
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A man was in his front yard mowing grasses when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mail box and again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Obviously angry, back into the house she went, stomping her feet.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is!!!"
(are you ready? ... this is a beauty ... scroll down...)
(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.e-wig.info%2Fimages%2Fhothair%2Fjs-15in-wvy-ext.jpg&hash=3203ffe685a069a546d26183429012f351dad0fe)
My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU\'VE GOT MAIL."
Fixed. And a lil better. ;)
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lol.
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I wonder how many stupid people actually have done that.
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I thought japaneses where less idiot than americans....
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A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University inMarquette.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn\'t really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they\'re all together to discuss the experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages, goes first."Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and
confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don\'t sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God\'s HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV\'s and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape.
The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."
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Two guys were out drinking and one pukes all over his shirt.
"Oh no, my wife is gonna kill me"
"Don\'t worry, just slip a $20 bill in your pocket and say someone else puked on you and gave you the money for the dry cleaning bill."
They agree its a great idea and continue drinking.
The next morning, his wife yells at him for getting drunk.
"No, honey, someone else puked on me. Look, he even gave me $20 for the cleaning bill."
"But, thats $40."
"Oh yeah, he also shit my pants, too."