Non Gaming Discussions => Off-Topic => Topic started by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 10:23:29 AM
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 10:23:29 AM
It has came to my attention, that we still have one virgin remaining on this board. Now, I know what everyone is thinking, "I can\'t believe Titan still hasn\'t paid a hooker", but no, I\'m not talking about him. I\'m talking about Paul, "Paul2". The man who always posts gay stuff in the birthday threads.
I say at this point, we as a family, on this forum, step up and give the boy some pointers. I mean, he\'s old enough that by now he should of at least paid someone, date raped someone or at the very least, fucked an ugly cousin. There\'s no reason for the boy to still be pussy-less.
1: Don\'t post gay music in another dude\'s thread. Even if you don\'t like rap, every straight male can appreciate the fact that rap demeans women in a sexual manner. Seriously, post scantly clad girls, booty clapping and boob jiggling.
This is acceptable music to post in a thread.
2: Be confident. I use to be shy around girls, then I got one knocked up. Now, I\'m just me and it works a lot better. Just act like you don\'t give a fuck and you\'ll get fucked.
3: Don\'t listen to gay music and if you do, don\'t admit it. Saying you like those songs, should never be mentioned outside of your own whole head. Chicks don\'t dig it and guy\'s will make fun of you. I like plenty of chick music and I use to tell people, now I don\'t. Why? Because it\'s not cool, man. It\'s just not cool. You can sit and jerk off to "My heart Will Go On", all you want, but you don\'t go around telling people how Celine Dion makes you cum and cry at the same time.
4: Learn to kiss. Practice on your mom or sister, if you have to. A good kisser will get his hands in panties faster than anything. Don\'t just throw your tongue out there man. Use the lips, it\'s all in the lips.
5: Even if you don\'t like sports, find a sport. Learn about it and pretend to like it. You\'ll be cooler around the guys and it gives you some kind of alpha male thing. If not, you\'re just a dork who sits around watching porn. This may not seem like a big thing, but it is. If chicks see you hanging around, talking about Alpha male stuff with other guys, then you are cooler. If not, you\'re the dork who sits around watching porn.
6: Don\'t mention you sit around watching porn.
7: Don\'t chase the pussy. Let the pussy chase you. Show you are interested (you don\'t wanna be mistaken for gay), but don\'t dedicate a lot of time to it. A girl knows instantly if she may sleep with you or not. You can\'t change that, so let her do the chasing. If she gives your the normal signals, then go for it. If not, don\'t worry about it.
8: Don\'t fall in love with the first piece of ass. I\'m sure you\'ll think it\'s great, but most likely, it\'s really not that great. Plus, do you really want to fuck the same girl the rest of your life? I think not.
9: Funny goes a long way. It\'s part of being charming. Don\'t be too funny, then you get in the friend zone. Be funny enough that you make \'em smile. I think it\'s a proven fact, when a girl smiles her vagina gets wetter each time. It\'s just the way the pussy works man. It\'s hooked to the smile. They smile, a string is pulled and water leaks out, that water allows you to penetrate. And by water, I mean vaginal mucus. Yeah, that sounds nasty, but really it isn\'t so bad.
10: If you score the phone number. Don\'t call right off. When you do call, be agressive. Women don\'t like a guy who pussy foots around it. Make it clear you want to fuck them and fuck them hard.
11:Ugly girls need fucked also. Keep that in mind.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 11, 2009, 10:48:01 AM
Quote from: Living-In-Clip
6: Don\'t mention you sit around watching porn.
You sure do take your time writing these out. LOL. You bored or something?
I do sit around and watch porn frequently...whoops, i just admit it.:D But who doesn\'t watches porn though? And I do like those music that you consider "gay", although "My Heart Will Go On" is just an all right song.:D
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 11, 2009, 10:55:21 AM
12: Rethink your entire attitude. Don\'t think "oh I like gay music but that\'s fine"...NO, IT IS NOT FINE. Being a gay little bitch fails to get you chicks. Lic is right, women desire confidence over all else. They dislike watching you prance around. Stumbling and talking about stupid things like Celin Dion hurts too. Talk about how confident and healthy you are. Women seek mates who can live long and support their child. Be like hey I don\'t smoke, I work out, barely been sick in my life, I just do and it get done.
Don\'t be a little faggot like poli, be a grown ass man. Pretend, act, whatever.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 11, 2009, 11:06:27 AM
Celine Dion is not really my type of artist, she has an amazing vocal for sure. But I prefer other artists more, usually one that are more contemporary.
I will just go with the flow in life. I don\'t know if I will get confidence, strong, or healthy. But its all right. But I am not going to pretend to act like I am healthy and confidence. Too much work and I am not good at pretending.:D
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 11:41:07 AM
You really don\'t want laid, do you? I mean, we\'re here, giving you tips. And you keep digging yourself a bigger hole. Don\'t mention Celine Dion as a vocalist. Don\'t mention being strong or healthy. Just act like its nothing.
You\'re a year younger than me. You know when I lost my virginity? I was 15, banging away on a 25 year old. This should be you. You should be, right now, banging away on some chick.
Spitting on your hand and pretending it\'s a blowjob only lasts so long, man. Eventually, you gotta sink it in.
13: Make the first move. If nothing else, look at it like this. Go up, ask a girl if she wants to fuck. Most likely, she\'ll say no. You ask enough girls, one will say yes. Bingo, you just got laid. If this is what it takes, then do that.
If that doesn\'t work - try this. You think a girl is into you? Just walk up, smack her on the ass. I mean, be sure she is into you - if she is, she\'ll find that hot. It never fails. If she isn\'t into you, you may get smacked. Just make sure she is into you.
Need a real life example? A girl I work with recently was hanging outside of my office, I had a rolled up magazine in my hand. I walked behind her, smacked her on the ass and winked at her. You know her response?
"That was kind of hot..."
Yeah, see..That\'s how it works. I knew she was into me, I took a chance, smacked her on the ass, showing her my sexual desire for her and she responded. It\'s that simple. I now know, from that brief interaction, that I can go further and pursue things with her.
14: There is a reason rappers / rockers get all the chicks. Because they make women sexual. They make it obvious what they want. To dominate them. Women dig that shit. It makes them feel good about themselves, knowing that you want to defile them in every possible way.
15: You don\'t need a large penis. I have an average / sorta small one. Just make it clear you have other talents and enjoy demonstrating those talents. Fuck, make a joke about your small dick. It makes women curious just how small you are and then, they\'ll wanna fuck you. By the time your pants is off, they\'re gonna pity fuck you at the very least. I\'m serious man, this shit works. I\'ve used it so many times. You make them curious, they\'ll do fucking anything short of letting you go R.Kelly on \'em.
16: Separate sex from emotions. This is the hard one. You\'ll fall for the first girl that really rocks your world. Don\'t , man. It\'s just sex. There doesn\'t have to be an emotional attachment. In fact, if not for the whole modern civilization nonsense, we wouldn\'t even have fuckin\' marriages and monogamous relationships. We\'re animals. We are meant to spread our seed to everything possible. How do we do that? By screwing every chick that walks by us. SEPARATE SEX FROM EMOTIONS !!! I only mention this rule, because , provided you do take our advice and do get laid, I know what will happen. You\'ll fall in "love". That\'s not what the goal here. The goal here is just to get you close enough to a girl, that she\'ll let you dip your hotdog in her bun.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 01:07:30 PM
Watch the video Paul. Fucking memorize it man. Kissing is the single most crucial thing. If you can\'t kiss, you are going to have problems making it past that first base.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 11, 2009, 02:01:20 PM
LOL. I am all right. I am not complaining you know. I am not as fortunate as you are, but I am okay with it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 05:21:55 PM
How can you be "all right"? Dude, you need laid.
You need a "fuck buddy". Every guy needs one. Married men, need one. Single men, need one. Homosexual men, need one. Fuckin\', preachers need one.
Just be aware of the fact your "fuck buddy" probably has other "fuck buddies". It happens. You just have to get over that mental block. It\'s rough, trust me. Just don\'t focus on it - when you\'re about to do her. Don\'t compare yourself to them, just be yourself. Do your thing. And if you\'re smart about it, you\'ll also have other "fuck buddies" or a wife - whatever works in your situation.
Paul, I\'m going to teach you the game. You just got to get your gear on and want to play it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Viper_Fujax on January 11, 2009, 05:43:17 PM
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 11, 2009, 05:55:49 PM
I\'m not really sure what Tropic Thunder had to do with this. But I support the clip!
We need background info, Paul. Ever been with a girl? If so - how far?
You do like girls, right? If you\'re gay, that\'s fine. Just tell us and we\'ll stop this rescue mission.
What\'s your type? Skinny? Big? Small? Tall? Glasses? Blind? Black? White? What\'s your type, man? For example, I prefer a skinny, young brunette with glasses. However, I\'ll hit anything that\'s female with a pulse. That\'s my general rule. I prefer those brunettes with glasses, but I\'m not gonna pass up the ugly chick also. She is a means to an end, you know? You gotta have a type. What\'s your type, man?
What\'s your plan? Every guy has a plan for that big moment. What\'s your plan? Just stick it in and get it done. Or maybe lick around the center a bit? Plan man. What\'s your fuckin\' plan?
And I just want to say this..
I am disgusted by this board! We have all been around each other all these years. Helped each other through relationships and now, you guys are fuckin\' turning your back on Paul. Help me, help him!!! Some of you fuckers are married, give the boy some tips. Some of you are total players - give the boy some game. Fuck, I\'m here trying to help him. [/b]
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Knotter8 on January 11, 2009, 06:19:04 PM
Order the book NOW ! (https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Falphamalesystem.com%2FAlphaMale_Flat.gif&hash=06c880f3e94e5a42ee992ba9c48f4e1cba4017d7)
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: clips on January 12, 2009, 06:40:40 AM
Damn will the real LIC please stand up?...This thread is hilarious...:laughing:..classic "LIC" fo sho!!...to be honest it\'s hard to follow anything LIC has stated, because he\'s nailed everything. Paul, Don\'t believe that garbage about how women like their men to be sensistive softies and cater to their every whim....women actually hate that.
In truth they want to somebody that exemplifies confidence and has exceptional swag to boost..ahem "like yours truly"...:fro:....and LIC is right when states let the girl come to you...you can go after her, but only if you know the vibe is there. I\'ve told the story of how i met this chick that looked like that short haired blond chick from the 90\'s show "melrose place"....i was just minding my business and she came up to me and generally stated she wanted to go somewhere and "chill". She was from sweden and fine as hell...i caused a catastrophy up in the cave that night.
If you\'re a good looking guy that also helps..."chicks like to rub on my bald dome"..both of them by the way...:D...if anything else,..even if you\'re an ugly lookin\' dude at the end of the day you must have confidence...how do you think the ugliest guys that DON"T have money still be with the hottest chicks you\'ve ever seen?...yep they mind-fucked those women that previously no one would\'ve ever thought to have tried to talk to,...
Remember it\'s good to be yourself, but confidence is big...and a little bulls**ting doesn\'t hurt either. If you work in inventory stock for walmart, just say you\'re a "shipping and receiving specialist contractor for walmart"...:fro:...don\'t worry Paul, we\'ll have you giving these chickenheads some stiff backshots and have them screamin\' your name and sayin "LAWD HAMMERCY" in no time!!!!....:thumb:
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 07:52:27 AM
Yeah, Clips is right. Man, don\'t be sensitive and all that shit. Save that for when you wanna get married.
Example? I was texting some young girl right recently (Not Dateline / Chris Hanson young tho!) - telling her about all the shit I\'m gonna do to her next time I see her. None of it\'s G-rated man and she likes that. She likes the fact I\'m confident enough to just come out and tell her, "hey, I\'m gonna fuck ya silly".
I ain\'t exactly handsome or built, but you just gotta roll with it, man. You just gotta make her think she\'s privileged to stick your dick in her mouth. That\'s the key man. That\'s all it is.
Oh and since Clips mentioned being bald. Dude, for fucking love of all that is Holy, shave your pubes. Not only does it make the tree look bigger (no forest = tree look bigger, simple math) it also encourages your lady friend (god, I hope its a lady) to go down on you. No woman wants a big mouth of hair, but all women want a mouth of pecker. Well, most, of course there are the ones who are sort of like guys (SEE: Sara, our resident lesbian - which is hot ).
Let me tell you a story.....Just sit down and relax. I work with a dude who is older than me, he is 27 I believe. He never ever tells his "fat girl" story. You know, the story that every guy has, that begins with "just how fat was she?". We\'ve never seen him with a chick. But we know he\'s not gay, because he stares at women in an almost creepy manner. So, being the brilliant group we are , we have deduced he is a virgin.
So, as a friend, I invite him to an out of town concert. I figure this is a good chance to get the boy laid. Now, my original thought is I am going to pay a hooker to suck his dick. On the way there, I make it clear, that being the good friend I am, that I will do this for him. He turns me down. He continues to ramble about how he doesn\'t need a hooker... We arrive at the venue early and all he keeps talking about is wanting some beer. No one else is there, except this one chick. She\'s kinda chunky, has a heat rash between her breast (She had big breasts). She\'s wearing fishnet stockings and is totally doable... She talks to us both, I make it clear that I\'m not single and that he is. She talks to him - tell hims she has beer in the car and asks if he is interested in going back to her car. He pulls, what I now call a "Paul". He tells her no. He fucking says he doesn\'t drink. WTF?
She continues to talk to us and this point, I tell him to fuck her or I\'m gonna fuck her and that I was just being polite and passing her down to him earlier. He starts chain smoking, he does everything possible to avoid the girl and she loses interest in him. Now, I\'m not going to tell you who ended up fucking her, as it should be obvious who ended up fucking her (hint: not the guy who is scared).
You know what though? This mother fucker had the nerve to ask if we could stop at the strip club on the way back. Honestly, what the fuck? He wants to pay to look at fucking boobs, go home and jack off in his mother\'s fucking basement, when he could of been fucking some girl in her car before a concert (and she wasn\'t *that* bad). Guess what? I\'ll never take this mother fucker anywhere, ever again. I mean, fucking seriously - he passed up pussy and wants to stop at the strip joint? Don\'t let that be you, Paul.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 08:21:59 AM
Read the article, Paul. Don\'t let this part be you.
Quote
But it can be a problem if you are regularly masturbating in preference to sharing pleasure with your partner (assuming they would like to share it with you) or, if you have no partner, in preference to following up any opportunities there may be to develop relationships with other people. Then you could be said to be hooked on masturbation, addicted to it.
I mean, I stroke it a lot, even when getting laid. Hell, I done it twice yesterday, once today and I\'m still getting laid. It\'s a way to pass time, ya\' know? But, come on. I\'m still taking the whole fishing pole and throwing it in the pond, ya\' know?
What state you live in, Paul? Cruise the personals man. Fuck, post a personal. Be honest, say you\'re a virgin. Women eat that shit up. Be the first one to properly fuck you, man, you\'ll get a ton of requests. I\'m serious dude. You have an ace card , a get out of fuckin jail free card. Use that card.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 08:43:18 AM
Quote from: Paul2
LOL. I am all right. I am not complaining you know. I am not as fortunate as you are, but I am okay with it.
You touch yourself a lot, don\'t you?
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 08:44:10 AM
Not anymore than you most likely.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 08:52:16 AM
Quote from: Jumpman
Not anymore than you most likely.
If there\'s another virgin here, it\'s definitely you.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 09:06:34 AM
I remember admitting to be a virgin when I was like 15 here, getting some flack...then losing it 3 months later.
I doubt your wife exists. Pics?
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 09:19:13 AM
I got married on April 17, 2004. It was a garden wedding.
Not putting pics of me and my wife on the internet.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 09:29:31 AM
I\'ll put pics of you and your wife on the Internet if you makes you feel better.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 09:38:58 AM
Guys, don\'t derail the thread. This about Paul. Not about Jumpy jerking off to Gman\'s wife!
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 09:40:19 AM
Ok.
Just fucking fuck me, already. Date: 2008-02-03, 3:29PM PST
Dear Men of Craigslist,
Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.
But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We\'ve done dinner and drinks. We\'ve gone dancing. We\'ve cuddled and watched a movie. I\'m wearing a low cut shirt and you\'ve been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.
When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck me. Trust me, I\'m not going to just lie still - I\'ll get involved. But don\'t make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We\'ve been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That\'s nice, but it\'s time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don\'t make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I\'m practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won\'t go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don\'t gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It\'s not what WE want.
OK, I know it\'s scary. There are lots of women out there who make fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don\'t think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to fuck like men:
1. Taking charge is not bad. Oh, there will be some women who feel that you are pushy. If you are making out with a woman, and she starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. If she says yes, say something like "I\'m sorry - you just look so fucking delicious. I\'ll go slower." Otherwise, skillfully move forward. If you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long, you\'re both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top of her, it\'s not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly stroking the top of her head. Seriously, grow a goddamn pair. YOU\'RE the man. Act like one.
2. Ohmyfuckinggod, please learn to respect the clit. It\'s different for every woman, so ask what she likes. Do not, I repeat, do not just wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you\'re trying to tickle her. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. Do not push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to get inside of. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle pressure against the outside of her pussy. Do not charge in with a single finger and start jabbing at things. And if you really don\'t know what to do, ask her. Just ask. "How do you like it?". It\'s a simple question, and most women will answer straight out. If she\'s being all coy, ask "Do you like pressure? Is it sensitive?" The clitoris is a varied item, indeed. Treat each one as though you have never encountered one before. Forget everything that your last partner liked.
3. Most women like to be fucked, and fucked well. Yes, there are women out there who want to "make love" every time - sweet, gentle, rocking love with lots of eye contact and loving kisses. Those women are not the majority. The majority like to be pounded. The majority like to have their hair pulled. The majority like a good, solid jackhammering. When a woman is bucking wildly against you, it\'s not because she wants you to pull back and slowly swirl your cock around her vagina like you\'re mixing a cake batter up there. It\'s because she wants you to hold down her arms, or grab her hips, or push her legs above her head, and fuck her harder. Don\'t be too afraid of what this means as far as gender equality goes - I am a raging feminist bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on fucking my throat from the inside out.
4. A little roughness is nice. Do not pretend that you had no idea that some women like their hair pulled. Do not act shocked if she wants you to spank her ("Really? Spanking? Won\'t it hurt?" - yes, it does. That\'s the fucking point). We know you\'ve read Stuff and Maxim, and that\'s all those laddie mags talk about in their "How to Please Her" sections. Start with light, full handed smacks to the area of her ass that she sits on. Judge her response and continue on from there. You don\'t have to bend her over one knee and tell her she\'s a naughty girl and that Daddy\'s going to punish her; save that for the fifth date. Women are less delicate than you think, so don\'t worry about breaking her hip.
5. It\'s OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are fucking a ninja. Unless you actually are a ninja, and have sneaked into our rooms with vibrating nanuchaku and zippered black pajamas, please, please make some noise. If you\'re banging a woman, and she\'s crying out and saying your name and moaning, and you can\'t even manage a grunt, she\'s going to feel like an idiot. You don\'t have to make the sounds she is making, but do SOMETHING. You know how when you are watching porn, and the girl does something great to the guy and the guy kind of goes "Ah!", half grunt, half yell? That\'s HOT. Do that. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly. Groan against her neck when you\'re in missionary position. You don\'t have to grunt like a mountain gorilla, but if you are totally mute, she\'s going to get worried.
6. Most women like dirty talk, in addition to the grunting. If you\'d like to get some dirty talk going, ask her if she likes the way you fuck her. If she responds well, continue with something like, "I love fucking you. God, you look so fucking hot." Is she still moaning in response? "Your tits are so beautiful." Does that work? If she doesn\'t respond well to the term "tits", you might have to stop there. If she keep moaning or responding, pass Go and collect $200. Try the following:
"Oh, god. Your pussy is SO tight." "You\'re so wet - are you wet because you like the feel of my cock ramming you?" "I think I\'m going to come inside you. I\'m going to fill up your little cunt." It doesn\'t matter that you\'re wearing a condom; we LOVE hearing this.
If all of those work, you can then progress to things like "sexy little bitch" and "dirty whore". Tread carefully, but please, tread. Do not tiptoe. Do not sit down. Charge.
6. You\'re not obligated to eat a woman out. In return, she\'s not obligated to choke on your dick. Don\'t skip one and expect the other. If you do eat a woman out, the only comment you should make about her pussy is how nice it is. The length of her labia minora, the color of her interior, her waxing job or full bush - you are not John Madden. No time for color commentary.
7. Do not bitch about condoms. Oh, we hate them. Trust us. They hurt us more than they hurt you. But we don\'t want to be preggers, and you don\'t want to catch anything, right? Don\'t whine about condom sex. Do not explain that you can\'t come with one on. LEARN to come with one on, or if not, help us figure out what to do with you once we\'re satisfied and it\'s time for you to let loose your load.
8. We really like it when you come. It\'s called a money shot for a reason. Watching semen shoot out of you is one of the most gratifying things EVER. However, do not assume that she wants you to jack it off onto her face. She might, but don\'t assume. Seeing and/or feeling you come is rewarding for us, so there\'s no need to deprive us of it, but please do consult us before unleashing. "I think I\'m going to come - how do you like it?" is a fair question that shouldn\'t rob you of your testicles.
In recent memory, I\'ve been fucked by a very aggressive, manly guy, and I\'ve been... well, fucked is the wrong term here. I\'ve been penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to when I\'m ready for my fill? Manly McHardon, that\'s who. ----------------------------------------------------
*New point of clarification - some people have brought up some really great issues in response to this post, so let me say this: I don\'t mean to imply that all women like to be treated like whores. I do mean to say that most women I know have told me that they like sex rougher than most men give it to them. Rough does NOT equal chains and bondage. And this applies to the bedroom only, and does not mean that she wants you to choose her dinner for her, or treat her like less of a person. **Some women have said that they don\'t like it rough and what the hell am I thinking? Well, girls, you\'re in the minority. HOWEVER, all women need to remember that, in addition to be straight forward about your sexual desires, you need to be straight forward about your sexual limits. Don\'t be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don\'t ever do something you don\'t want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 09:41:03 AM
I\'m not going to de-virginize Paul.
I already took clip\'s virginity. Nasty. I\'ve never seen dingleberries that resembled a vine of grapes.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 09:45:39 AM
That Craigslist ad is so very true,.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 09:54:31 AM
LOL. What\'s going on? I still have the mind of an 11 years old boy, so I don\'t know if I will ever grow up though. It quite unfortunate of events that happen as a child growing that turn me like that...but again, I am not complaining. I am trying to live a stable, normal, and happy life.
But LIC, seriously, why are you spending so much time on this? Of all the members in this forum, why are trying to help me instead of other members who I wouldn\'t be surprised if a few of them are still a virgin.. I never seen you in person and we don\'t know each other. why are you so dedicated to this? Maybe your friend that doesn\'t want to nail the girl might have some personal reasons that he doesn\'t want to talk about. So he rather paid to watches hookers and masturbate. Who knows what his reasons are, but surely he\'s really uncomfortable. Everybody is different you know.:D
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 09:57:54 AM
Quote from: Paul2
LOL. What\'s going on? I still have the mind of an 11 years old boy,
HOLD IT RIGHT THERE..............
NEVER NEVER include "11 year old boy" in a thread about losing your virginity.
Let me continue reading.....
Oh. Sorry. :laughing:
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 10:11:17 AM
Quote from: Paul2
LOL. What\'s going on? I still have the mind of an 11 years old boy, so I don\'t know if I will ever grow up though. It quite unfortunate of events that happen as a child growing that turn me like that...but again, I am not complaining. I am trying to live a stable, normal, and happy life.
But LIC, seriously, why are you spending so much time on this? Of all the members in this forum, why are trying to help me instead of other members who I wouldn\'t be surprised if a few of them are still a virgin.. I never seen you in person and we don\'t know each other. why are you so dedicated to this? Maybe your friend that doesn\'t want to nail the girl might have some personal reasons that he doesn\'t want to talk about. So he rather paid to watches hookers and masturbate. Who knows what his reasons are, but surely he\'s really uncomfortable. Everybody is different you know.:D
You\'ll rethink your entire attitude after you\'re pounding away on some tightly made 19 year old hotty.
Try drinking? You can act like a retard and get away with it in most situations. Maybe you\'ll display some confidence and not this pussy little bitch stuff you\'re replying with. I\'m generally a laid back guy in real life but when the alcohol pours through me THE BEAST IS UNLEASHED.
Do. There is no try.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 10:33:10 AM
Oh fucking God. I can\'t. I don\'t even.
Fuck me, I don\'t know what to say.
I mean, fuck. I\'m dumb founded. I\'m confused.
Fuck me, this has turned bad.
Paul - the next booty call I make (and it\'ll be soon), I dedicate to you.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 10:59:18 AM
okay, maybe i use the wrong word "dedicate". By that I mean, why are you spending so much time trying to help a person that you never met.
Its not like I want to turn out like this, but its unfortunate it happened, but I am not asking for much, I just want to be physically, mentally, and emotionally stable...so maybe my mind will grow up too instead of being immature.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 11:07:40 AM
Man.. You took a helpful thread and make it so fucking depressing.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 11:08:22 AM
Do you like girls, Paul? Coz maybe LIC is going in the wrong direction. :p
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 11:17:44 AM
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 11:22:43 AM
Well....I knew there had to be at least one in this group. :)
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 11:34:50 AM
Well, fuck me. I started a rescue mission for a gay guy.
I\'m sorry man!
I don\'t have any tips on that shit. I mean, I\'m a dude , but I don\'t know how to get with other dudes.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 11:37:03 AM
Quote from: Living-In-Clip
Well, fuck me. I started a rescue mission for a gay guy.
I\'m sorry man!
I don\'t have any tips on that shit. I mean, I\'m a dude , but I don\'t know how to get with other dudes.
See what you did? You pulled him out of the closet. Not that there\'s anything wrong with that. Titan is bisexual, I\'ve heard.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 11:42:32 AM
I\'m cool with it man. I just I didn\'t have any idea. I guess all the warning signs were there. The crappy music, the avoiding posting scantly clad girls.
Man, I\'m sorry I pulled you out of the closet like that. Should of just PMed me and said you was all about the pecker. I would of left this alone.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 12:11:14 PM
Nothing wrong with being gay. This is 2009.
No idea if he pounding away the dudes though. I can only wonder how gay guys think so looks like you\'re on your own Pauly.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 12:27:57 PM
lol, I am a virgin. But isn\'t Gmanjoe short for gay man joe?
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 12:28:05 PM
It\'s just shocking.
I mean, we already had one homosexual on the board- Sara and that was cool. Now we got a dude to represent the homosexual minority on the board. Like, Jumpy said. Nothing wrong with it, it\'s 2009 and gay has been in since 2002. So, it\'s all good man.
All fuckin\' good.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 12:31:18 PM
Quote from: Paul2
lol, I am a virgin. But isn\'t Gmanjoe short for gay man joe?
Don\'t deflect your gayness on me. Won\'t work. I kid around a lot but it\'s clear I prefer the female persuasion. If you like sausages, that\'s you man. I\'m not putting you down for it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 12:40:36 PM
Quote from: Living-In-Clip
It\'s just shocking.
I mean, we already had one homosexual on the board- Sara and that was cool. Now we got a dude to represent the homosexual minority on the board. Like, Jumpy said. Nothing wrong with it, it\'s 2009 and gay has been in since 2002. So, it\'s all good man.
All fuckin\' good.
eh. I wouldn\'t be surprise there are other gay members in this forum that are still active. But I have other problems to worry about like anxiety disorder, sinus pain and being gay is the least of my worry. I could careless actually about being gay, is that other weren\'t out so i don\'t want to be out either until you kept pushing me.
I have crazy times growing up from malpractice from a doctor at the age of 11 that causes sinus pain, emotional disorder, and self-esteem problem. I never thought of it until years after the surgery, the pain on my nose\'s bones worsen and doesn\'t go away. Then I thought the doctor misdiagnosed me, until recently I realized it was a malpractice just for money. Crazy.
But eh, at least I am not like this German American teacher who is gay but married to hide his sexuality. Who is a hypocrite I say, he discriminated against me because of my Asian race but he did it from behind. A coward person I say. I think the whole class caught his face blushed one time when a White student guy approached him to turn in the paper. Maybe the teacher got excited. But he was trying to hide it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 12:44:33 PM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Don\'t deflect your gayness on me. Won\'t work. I kid around a lot but it\'s clear I prefer the female persuasion. If you like sausages, that\'s you man. I\'m not putting you down for it.
Eh, I am just joking there. I don\'t even know you.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 12:46:56 PM
Quote from: Paul2
eh. I wouldn\'t be surprise there are other gay members in this forum that are still active. But I have other problems to worry about like anxiety disorder, sinus pain and being gay is the least of my worry. I could careless actually about being gay, is that other weren\'t out so i don\'t want to be out either until you kept pushing me.
I have crazy times growing up from malpractice from a doctor at the age of 11 that causes sinus pain, emotional disorder, and self-esteem problem. I never thought of it until years after the surgery, the pain on my nose\'s bones worsen and doesn\'t go away. Then I thought the doctor misdiagnosed me, until recently I realized it was a malpractice just for money. Crazy.
But eh, at least I am not like this German American teacher who is gay but married to hide his sexuality. Who is a hypocrite I say, he discriminated against me because of my Asian race but he did it from behind. A coward person I say. I think the whole class caught his face blushed one time when a White student guy approached him to turn in the paper. Maybe the teacher got excited. But he was trying to hide it.
I don\'t know what to fucking say. This post just covered everything known to fucking man.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 12:56:57 PM
Quote from: Paul2
eh. I wouldn\'t be surprise there are other gay members in this forum that are still active. But I have other problems to worry about like anxiety disorder, sinus pain and being gay is the least of my worry. I could careless actually about being gay, is that other weren\'t out so i don\'t want to be out either until you kept pushing me.
I have crazy times growing up from malpractice from a doctor at the age of 11 that causes sinus pain, emotional disorder, and self-esteem problem. I never thought of it until years after the surgery, the pain on my nose\'s bones worsen and doesn\'t go away. Then I thought the doctor misdiagnosed me, until recently I realized it was a malpractice just for money. Crazy.
But eh, at least I am not like this German American teacher who is gay but married to hide his sexuality. Who is a hypocrite I say, he discriminated against me because of my Asian race but he did it from behind. A coward person I say. I think the whole class caught his face blushed one time when a White student guy approached him to turn in the paper. Maybe the teacher got excited. But he was trying to hide it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: clips on January 12, 2009, 01:45:37 PM
Uhm....okay..erm...aha...so i guess paul is indeed gay?.....he did say he was a virgin, but he kinda danced around the gay question....or maybe i\'m missed something?...:confused:
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 02:15:39 PM
Yes clips, Paul admitted he was gay.
You can private message him and no one but you two will know.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Luke on January 12, 2009, 02:23:12 PM
So... Was this thread sposed to have something funny somewhere in it? I think I missed it.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 02:25:45 PM
Quote from: Luke
So... Was this thread sposed to have something funny somewhere in it? I think I missed it.
I doubt you could comprehend a funny more sophisticated than someone getting hit in the balls.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Viper_Fujax on January 12, 2009, 03:54:09 PM
Quote from: Luke
So... Was this thread sposed to have something funny somewhere in it? I think I missed it.
how is "i will massacre you! I WILL FUCK YOU UP!!" not funny to you?
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 12, 2009, 03:58:07 PM
Quote from: Luke
So... Was this thread sposed to have something funny somewhere in it? I think I missed it.
No. It was suppose to help fuckin\' Paul, get fucked. Turns out he is gay.
Sue me, for helping.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 04:27:27 PM
Helping or trying to expose Paul being gay?(https://psx5central.com/community/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fl.yimg.com%2Fus.yimg.com%2Fi%2Fmesg%2Femoticons7%2F39.gif&hash=406262ffd91ed04089b8aad67f31d8d76f247396)
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Titan on January 12, 2009, 05:29:42 PM
I don\'t think LIC cares enough to try an expose someone for being gay. Not like you gave any reason to suspect it until this thread.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 06:30:31 PM
Paul has always been cool with me. I bet I dress better than him though. I\'m a raging Metrosexual.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Paul2 on January 12, 2009, 06:36:02 PM
*vomits* :sick: Gmanjoe, don\'t think too highly of yourself. I bet I am better looking than you though. How old are you btw? 40?
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 12, 2009, 06:40:52 PM
Quote from: Paul2
*vomits* :sick: Gmanjoe, don\'t think too highly of yourself. I bet I am better looking than you though. How old are you btw? 40?
Bitch. You wanna have a runway challenge? I will strut and pose like Zoolander on steroids!
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Jumpman on January 12, 2009, 06:42:16 PM
Ah the fucking buzzkill crew killed this thread.
Next.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: Living-In-Clip on January 13, 2009, 02:44:33 AM
Quote from: GmanJoe
Paul has always been cool with me. I bet I dress better than him though. I\'m a raging Metrosexual.
Pretty sure we all know and accept he is gay now.
Title: Let\'s help Paul...
Post by: GmanJoe on January 13, 2009, 06:47:00 AM