Recent Posts

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Off-Topic / Re: Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Paul2 on January 21, 2026, 06:52:07 PM »

that sucks that you still have depression.  if its go away completely for good in the future.  maybe you should stop taking it so you don't have to worry about a very small chance of getting side effect and having to remember to take it every day.

i have a mild case of social anxiety disorder, paranoia, pervert disorder, and narcissm disorder though because of the very strong ear pulled when i was a kid by another kid.  eventually i had surgery remove from the head scar on my upper left side of my head to get rid of the pain and anger of where the scar was.  the kid that bullied me when i was a kid pulled my left ear so hard that the left side of my head stretched out and i got a scar there on the upper left side of my head that gave me a stroke on where the scar was.

removing it completely rid of the pain and anger.  i had 3 surgeries to remove the scar completely.  he didn't surgically remove the scar completely on the first 2 surgeries.  on the 3rd surgeries i had, i think he over remove the scar that he probably remove the scalp that has hair on it too.  because of a misunderstanding.  he over removed the scar and a little of the scalp on my head too.  then 3 days later after the surgery, my nephew touched the scar that has stitches on it and the pain come back somewhat.  and whenever i have pain on where the scar is and any pain on my head, i got angry easily.  but overall, its much, much better than not getting surgery to get rid of the scar at all which got rid of the stroke that i had.

i also got a lump on the left temple of my face too because of the left ear pulled that gave me pervert and narccism order.  like over 14 years later after the ear pulled, i acupunctured the lump on my left temple by myself and discovered it rid of my narcissm disorder.  it took 5 days to see results.  like 2 or 3 weeks later, the lump grew back and the narcissm came back too but the narcissm is a bit less severe though.  then a little over 4 years later, i acupunctured my left temple again and this time i paid attention to see if it also rid of my pervert disorder too and it did rid of it completely.  its also took 5 days to see result.  again, about 2 to 3 weeks later, the lump on my left temple grew back and pervert and narcissm disorders come back too.  but overall it rid of the pervert disorder a little bit though i think.

oh yeah, the lump on my left temple also gives me mild social anxiety disorder and paranoia too.  acupuncture it reduces my mild s.a.d. (social anxiety disorder) and paranoia a lot but like 3 weeks later when the lump grew back.  the s.a.d. and paranoia come back too.  overall it's a bit less severe compare to before the acupuncture.  i think i need like a surgery to remove the stretch out skin on my left temple and stitches the skin together to get rid of the lump so in hoping to rid all the mental disorders i had but i am kind of worry to do it.  i am afraid the surgeon might not give me a proper surgery.

the medication zyprexa i take also reduce my s.a.d. and paranoia but not completely though.  it also reduces my pervert disorder a little to somewhat too.  narcissm is still somewhat the same though.  2 nights ago, i can feel the medication works where i can feel it repair brain cells on the scalp of both sides of my head.  the good news is my s.a.d. and paranoia disorder is somewhat reduce.  the bad news is that its not completely gone though.  hopefully one day, the medication rid of it completely.

i remember over 3 years ago my previous psychiatrist prescript me escitalopram because i told him i have social anxiety disorder.  maybe because i didn't know what s.a.d. called in vietnamese, he probably though i get scare around people which is also the case.  anyway, the medication escitalopram that he prescript me gave me a very mild to mild pedophilia's disorder i think.  it took like 2 to 3 weeks taking it to get that disorder.  i didn't realize that was the case until another month or 2 later to realize that.  the cool thing is, the psychiatrist off that med for me when i talked him on the phone again on the day i had appointment with him even though i didn't tell him that it gave me mild pedeophile disorder.

then about another year and half later, in around mid 2024, he prescript me trazodone to help with my sleep because of the sleep problems i have.  like some days, i sleep okay, and then some days, i couldn't sleep at all or not enough that another some days later, i oversleep to make up for it.  because i told him that, he prescript me trazodone and like another month pass iirc, i still have sleep problems, and he double the strength of trazodone, and i still have sleep problems.  so like another month after that, i told him i still have sleep problem, that he up the dose 3 times from the 2 times that he already increased it which total 6 times the strength of the normal dose he gave me 2 months prior.

late that night, about half an hour later after i took that strength of med, i start having a mild heart attack on and off.  i regret taking this med and at this strength.  the mild heart attack didn't go away completely until sometimes in the morning maybe 6 or 7 a.m. is where it went away completely.  i texted him that, and not long later, he called me on the phone, he said he will off this med and prescript me a different med.  i said i don't want to take any other meds except zyprexa because of their side effects.  he said he can't do that because i have sleep problems and if i don't take med for it then he will close the file on me and i don't have to see him anymore and told me to see a different psychiatrist which thanks to my mom's help i did see a different psychiatrist.

i learned that the hard way, no matter what, i will take zyprexa only and no other medications since august 2024 because of their side effects.  not only other meds don't help but it give me unwanted side effects except zyprexa.

around may 8 of 2025, i think the very mild to mild pedeophile disorder is gone completely i think.  again, escitalopram doesn't reduce or rid of my s.a.d. but it gave me a mild pedeophile disorder that can get me in trouble.

so far, i been doing pretty good especially the zyprexa seems to help me somewhat with my s.a.d. and paranoia lately.  its also reduces my pervert disorder somewhat too i think.

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Off-Topic / Re: Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Titan on January 21, 2026, 05:28:45 PM »

Yeah. I was pretty depressed during he pandemic. Worst mental state I was in in a very long time. And yeah, I still take escitalopram. I was thinking about coming off of it but then I realized my periodic depression hasn't come back. Basically once in a while I'd get really depressed for no reason every couple months for like a period of a week and it'd go away. Since I've been on SSRIs, I haven't had that come back. So that's a nice bonus lol.

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Off-Topic / Re: Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Paul2 on January 17, 2026, 08:06:04 PM »

oh i see.  cool.

oh yeah, re-reading again on your first post of this thread.  i remember you said you got into depression possibly because of the pandemic.  has it gone away completely yet?  i remember you said you took meds because of it.  do you no longer take meds anymore if you are doing much better since if your depression is gone like completely or not?  hope that you are doing well and your business goes well.

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Off-Topic / Re: Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Titan on January 17, 2026, 06:59:38 PM »

They were pictures I took for eBay listings. I use a website called Canva for all my image editing. It's cheaper, quicker and easier for what I do than Photoshop.

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Off-Topic / Re: Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Paul2 on January 16, 2026, 05:03:24 PM »

looking good.  did you took pictures of those consoles and edited them on the refurbished and repairs page?  the pictures look really good.

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Off-Topic / Launched my website a couple weeks ago

« Last post by Titan on January 16, 2026, 03:39:48 PM »

Haha. I read this quote from a post I made. This didn't age well.....

Sorry I haven't been around much. Been crazy the last couple months between my ebay business, my YouTube channel and now I've gotten a new job. It's part time but it's my foot in the door. I accepted a job as a carpenter's apprentice. I needed to get out of the corporate world because it sucks like a mother fucker. That and being home all the time unemployed was weighing heavily on my mental health. It's a lot of fun. I split my time between the shop and on the job site. And my boss is mega cool and teaching me everything I need to know about construction. So far I can see myself doing this for a living. We'll see where this goes but I know I'm on the right path.

5 years later, fuck that shit lol. I've been working for an apartment complex since and I really don't care for construction anymore. I'm glad I've spent the last few years in it because it gave me some vital DIY skills that will come in handy when my wife and I buy a house and when we rent out our condo we live in currently now. Anyway, I'm getting a bit off topic.

I got into YouTube during the pandemic as a way for me to keep sane while I was unemployed. I fixed consoles and sold them on ebay and recorded the process. For like 3 years or so I did it as a hobby. Some years only a few videos went up because I was focusing on my construction career. But when I got my channel monetized, something flipped. I thought long and hard about what I wanted in life. I knew I wanted my own business. It was actually one thing I was planning with construction. But I also went to college for film. Granted, when I went to college, social media and YouTube were still in their infancy and making a living off of it just wasn't a thing then. But the skills I learned there I carried with me through life, especially in my former life as a photographer. I really enjoyed YouTube and creating videos. I really enjoyed fixing up consoles and selling them. There is a market for refurbished consoles and for people to repair retro consoles. I think in the last couple years I've been working on developing the business idea and improving my channel, I have a good business model with multiple revenue streams. It's as if all my skills came full circle here to this point.

About a year ago I did a full rebrand of my channel. Then over the next few months I worked with a friend on having them make my website. I sat on it for a few months while I filed the paperwork for my LLC and did the final touches to get my business in order. Then I decided January 1, it was time to make it official. So anyway, here's my website! I'll be adding physical products in time but for now I'm just offering repair services.

https://www.titanrepairs.co

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Happy Birthday board / Re: Happy Late 2025 Birthday Kurt Angle

« Last post by Paul2 on January 15, 2026, 06:39:24 PM »

thanks for welcoming me back.

Sounds like a good birthday party there.

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Off-Topic / Re: Got a new job!

« Last post by Paul2 on January 15, 2026, 02:25:57 PM »

(continued)

if i remember correctly, there are some rare moments probably around last year of 2025 after january 29, 2025, like every few days to few weeks to few months where i thought that i might still not masturbate the right way because the white spots on my dick still didn't go away completely and much at all but when i think and remember about that i usually pee in 1 stream of urine instead of 2 reassured me that i mostly masturbate the right way.

around early 2025 to now mid january 2026, i didn't masturbate much.  usually, i go as long as 9 days without masturbating, and on average maybe around 3 to 5 days of not masturbating in hoping to get rid of the white spots in my penis.  what i am trying to say is, by far masturbating the right way should dissolve the spots in my dick and 2nd important thing is i think is to masturbate less often so in hoping rid of the bacteria infections in my dick sooner.  i even tried laying down in bed naked for like at least 1 hour and sometimes i lay down longer than that, as long as several hours long on some to many days during the summer of 2005 with the electric fan on blowing where i was laying down in hoping to get rid of the bacteria infection in my private area faster.

i also tried shaving my private area with razorblade every few months like every 3 to 4 months to expose my penis to air so it won't cover my penis with hair around my penis in hoping to get rid of the bacteria infection on my penis.  i even tried plucking hair mostly on my penis area during that time so air can get around and in my penis to get rid of the bacteria infection.  but the white spots on my dick didn't go away completely.  sometimes, it look like it dissolved, and grow back a little.

its not until late 2025, maybe october or november 2025, i can't remember that well, i try to twisted my right fist the other way like counter clockwise so in hoping to correct grip of my right hand holding my penis whenever i masturbate to make it masturbate more correctly this time so i won't pee in 2 streams of urine at all anymore.  because i remember back in late 1999, probably late october to early november 1999, i got bullied in class in school, and this student boy wanted to beat me and i fight back badly, the teacher called the securities is what i think they are called.  the boy quickly left so he won't get in trouble after he tried to attack me by pushing my head down.

so 2 securities came, and they asked me to follow them to the office but i didn't go if i remember correctly, so each of the 2 securities guy grab one of my fists, one on each side and made me walk out the classroom to go to the office.  one of the 2 securities guy, the security guy on my right side bend my right fist inward with his hands as he made me walk out the classroom.  he bending my right fist inward hard and held it bent as he made me walk out the classroom like that hurt my wrist and fist.  as each seconds went back, the pain got worse and worse that i told him to let go of my right hand but he ignored me.  so i used my left hand and the security guy on my left side let go of my left hand and i used my left hand to pushed the hands off the security guy on the right side who was bending and holding my right fist.

he still didn't let go off my right fist so i scratched one of his hands with my left hand's fingers and he finally let go of my right fist.  he got scratched marks on his hand and it bled a little.  i think he did it on purpose mistreating me, it might be a racial discrimination by bending my right hand inward hard and held it bend like that i hurt my right fist as time goes by.  when i told him to let go of my right hand like several times, the security on my right side ignored me and he had a cold blank look on his face.  the security guy on the left side of me held my left wrist but didn't bend my fist inward as he walked me out the classroom by comparison.

in the school's office, the guy that bent my right fist told the principal, she's probably an assistant principal that i scratched his hand and it bled but he didn't tell her he bent and held it bent on my right fist when he made me walked out the classroom.  i don't remember if i told her that he bent my right hand/fist hard and it hurts and he didn't let go and that is why i tried to pulled his hands away from my right fist.  maybe i did tell her my side of story but i am not sure if i tell her clearly enough.  so anyway, i got suspended for several days.  maybe for 5 days, i don't remember that well.  a day later after that student (like bullied me and pushed my head down with his hands a day earlier), he went to school and he got suspended too i think.

what i am trying to say is, because that security guy that bent my right fist and held it bent like that for some seconds, it probably deformed my right fist.  so even in mid 2024 and nearly the rest of 2025, my deformed right fist gave me not 100% right grip holding my penis as i masturbate and that is probably why i still got bacteria infection on my private and still some rare time, i pee in 2 streams of urine instead of one.  speaking of peeing in 2 streams of urine, the 2 streams are usually didn't split out that far apart compare to years prior where i masturbate the wrong way.

so either around october or november of last year, i tried to correct my right fist by twisting my fist counter clockwise and twist it back up to undo the slight bent of my right fist.  so whenever i masturbated, some days later, there are still some rare moments where i still peed in 2 streams of urine a little, that some days later i tried to correct my fist again by twisting it this way or that way to unbent the right fist.

i probably corrected my right fist to 100% or nearly 100% in probably around november of last year, but in probably late december of last year, i was worry its still 100% yet, so i twist my right fist counter clockwise to correct it.  anyway, i don't remember exactly what happened in november and december of last year, but i think i pee in 1 stream of urine nearly 100% of the time, and in some rare time, it wanted to split into 2 streams again but the streams were close together apart though which is not bad.

in early january 2026, my penis felt a lot better and the bacteria infections don't act up much,  i got a lot less unstable self esteem from it.  like today, late at night or you can say way early in the morning, a few minutes before 1 a.m. today, i can feel the white spots on my dick dissolved some more, and i put on my eyeglasses as i was sitting in my computer and pulled my short down somewhat to looked at penis and i can see the white spots on my dick are much smaller.  this time for real i think, and my self esteem are a lot stable too and it didn't unstable my self-esteem much.  probably under 1 out of 10 on average by now on the severity of the bacteria infection acting up on my private area since nearly 1 a.m. this morning.  i am very happy.

i will continue writing more later.

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Happy Birthday board / Re: Happy Late 2025 Birthday Kurt Angle

« Last post by Kurt Angle on January 15, 2026, 02:19:02 PM »

Welcome back Paul!

It's been a while so its good to see you back. Thanks for the belated birthday thread it was my 50th last year so I had a few family members come over for a little party which was nice. I don't really get much for birthdays these days but I did get a bit of money being a special birthday.

I'm officially old now 

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Off-Topic / Re: My Late 4 Year Anniversary of Martial Arts Practice And Other Discoveries

« Last post by Paul2 on January 15, 2026, 04:54:13 AM »

Since I was finally able to log in to this forum again since yesterday, might as well update on my late 4 years anniversary of martial arts practice and later and other discoveries i found during these times.  i only got about 4 1/2 hours of sleep 2 days ago and only about 5ish hours of sleep yesterday and i still can't sleep yet today so might as well update on my martial arts anniversary and other discoveries too.

-so far to this day, i haven't improved my move #1 to the intermediate level yet but i gotten quite close i think.  on my previous anniversaries i think i did say i improved to intermediate level already but i think i haven/t yet though.  but it gotten quite close so far.

-same thing with move #3, i am still at beginner's level i think but so far hasn't gotten to intermediate yet either.

-since around mid 2024, around june to july 2024, i did it 10 times on move #11 which is doing cartwheel somewhat backward sideway on the left side on the 2 days per week of practicing that move.  i practice it 10 times per day instead of 6 times per day on the 2 days of practicing that move at the park.  on my previous anniversary, i did 6 times on late may 2024, but i increased it to 10 times per day since either june or july 2024.  i kind of remember i overslept a lot on many days around mid june to late june of 2024 though that i didn't get to practice martials at all in those few weeks of oversleeping as much as 16 hours per day if i remember correctly.  but i do remember there are moments seeing some improvement doing this move in either mid or late july 2024 though.

-so far to this day, i still haven't become intermediate on move #10 either.  surprisingly, its easy to do but takes so long to see improvement.  i think i gotten quite close to intermediate though.

- i did worse on move #4 compare to early june 2023.  after early june 2023, i did worse and wasn't sure why that was until late october 2025.  in either october 29 or 30 of 2025, i took the bus to a food to go store to buy a food to eat.  while sitting on the bench waiting at the bus stop, i noticed my right foot if i remember correctly was tilted to the left side.  so later that day, i pushed my right hip to the right to straighten my right foot.

maybe it was october 29, later that night i watched some clips of family feud on youtube and during fast money round, the host asked the contestant something which i don't remember now, probably what kind of exercise you do or something like that and the contestant said jumping jacks.  it gives me an idea to do jumping jack the next time i exercise at home.

so the next day, when i exercise at home in my bedroom, i include jumping jack as my last exercise and i can feel the left side of my right knee hurts many of the time i do the jumping jacks.  i did 30 times for the jumping jacks.

the next day, on october 31, 2025 while waiting at the bus stop to take a ride home. i was sitting down on the bench and this time, i paid attention to my feet and i still notice my right foot still tilted to the left side.  like some seconds to some minutes later, i realized because i tilted my head and body to the left side this past few years if i remember correctly, it made my right foot tilted to the left side too.  the reason why i tilted my head to the left side was because the compass on the left side of my head is broken and it couldn't balance my head and body and it made my body titled to the right side, so i tried to balance it by tilting it to the left side.  also, i wanted to get blood and oxygen to flow to the left side of my head too by tilting to the left side.

so on october 31, i realized because i tilted my head to the left side too frequent, it injured the left side of my right knee.  no wonder i got pain on the left side of my right knee when i do jumping jacks.  not only that but it made my right foot tilted to the left side too.  no wonder i felt pain on the left side of my right knee many of the times on some of the moves of martial arts practice at the park or wherever i practice this past 1 to 2 years.

so i tried not to tilt my head to the left side but by balancing it straight up center and let it balance or tried to let it tilted to the right side a little.  so later that night on october 31, on the last exercise move i made which is jumping jacks, the pain on the left side of my right knee are mostly gone to no pain at all doing the 30 jumping jacks.  thinking about it, if i remember correctly, i was quite happy to discovered that.  a few days later or so, the pain on the left side of my right knee are pretty much all gone as i did the jumping jacks on each most nights.

on mid november 2025, after about 2 weeks to 15 days doing 30 jumping jacks per day on most days, i noticed that i can jump a bit higher.  i was quite happy.

on mid november of 2025, probably around november 10 to november 12, 2025, during martial arts practice, i noticed i did somewhat better this time around doing move #4 after i tried to balance my head and body and not let it tilted to the left too much.  the pain on the left side of my right knee is mostly gone too doing other martial arts moves like move #1 and move #10.  i was quite happy if i remember correctly.

-on around july probably july 17 2024, (a little over a month after i posted my 3 years anniversary on this forum), i was helped by the scientists that controlled me and made my right hand hold my penis the right way when i masturbated that day.  i used my entire right hand to hold my penis to stroke it as i masturbated.  after a few strokes, it made me realized maybe this is the right way to masturbate.  because before that, i almost always masturbated with the tip of my right hand fingers stroking my penis.  i didn't realize that was the wrong way to masturbate.

because when i was around 8 to 9 years old, this roommate man touched me inappropriately and stroked my cock with the tip of his fingers because he is much older than me and his hand should be much bigger than mine so he used the tip of his fingers to stroke the tip of my penis that time, not only that but he stroke it fast to very fast.  it turned out that was the wrong way too masturbate.

so starting on around july 17, 2024, with the help of the scientists, i finally masturbate correctly this time.  i probably thought that time i masturbate 100% correctly by using my whole entire hand to masturbate and i lifted up the foreskin of my penis as i masturbate.  if i remember correctly,  as days and weeks went by, i think i masturbate much correctly this time around but still not 100% though.  i can feel the white spots on my private under control but not completely gone though.  overall, my penis felt somewhat better but still not 100%% though and my self esteem is still not 100% stable either.

its not until a little over half a year later, on late january 2025, probably january 29, 2025, i masturbate using the whole entire palm of my right hand, this time, i didn't bother lifting my foreskin all the way up as i masturbate but stroke it back and forth and do let the cum shoot out of my penis.  i felt better afterward.  because i was touched inappropriately when i was a kid, masturbating the wrong way also made my penis dried and wrinkly, i also got a scar on the back of my penis and my penis probably shrunk because of it.  so my penis is small even when i masturbate, it didn't grow as big as i would like.  my assumption is because of scar on the back of my penis, i got wrinkly and dried penis which i suspect shrunk my penis even when i got a hard on and my penis is not that big.  kind of like a raisin which shrunk and got wrinkly from the grape.

by that i mean, i am a tall person and my hand is medium big, if my penis is small, don't bother lifting up my foreskin as i masturbate with my hand as there is not enough space to move my medium big hand back and forth on my small penis to lift up the foreskin.  so if trying to lift up my penis despite it being small, i still get bacteria infection and it won't go away completely.  unless my penis is big like long, then there is space for me to naturally life up my foreskin if there is a decent to good amount of space to stroke it back and forth i think.  especially if there is space for me to stroke it all the way back which will naturally lift up my foreskin.  so starting on around january 29, 2025.  i didn't bother lifting up my penis and later that time, my self-esteem control by the bacteria on my penis is much under control and much stable.

also starting on that day if i remember correctly, i pee 1 stream of urine most of the time instead of the usual 2 streams.  some rare time, it goes to 2 streams but a little though.  not much.  peeing 1 stream of urine most of the time instead of 2 streams must have means that i masturbate mostly correctly this time around.  i am quite happy to discovered that if i remember correctly.  compare to say like years prior where i still masturbate the wrong way, i almost always pee in 2 streams instead of one.

until around early 2020, after i clean the tip of my foreskin with water after i lifted my foreskin from masturbating, i then dried it off with paper towels and pulled my foreskin down.  i don't pee in 2 streams but that was the wrong way to masturbate and cleaning it with water and drying it won't get rid of bacteria infection.  what i am trying to say is, i been peeing in 2 streams of urine for about 27 years of my life before i pee in 1 stream most of the time.  and about another 3 1/2 years of my life, i masturbate somewhat correctly and i pee in 2 streams somewhat less frequent.  which total about 30 years and 8 months of my life masturbating the wrong way.  then about another 1 year and 4 months later, i masturbate even more correctly this time around and i finally pee in 1 stream of urine instead of 2 most of the time this around whenever i peed.  so, in total, it took me about 32 years of masturbating the wrong way to discovered that i believe.

i am spent, i am tired now.  i am going to continued more later.