Okay, all of this is true, so very true, doubt it, kiss my ass, i could care less.
If you guys listen to Howard Stern or are a fan, you would know that he is here in Vegas now taping his shows from Tues. to Thursday. I\'ve been listening to Howard Stern for the last 8 months and have grown into a fan. Knowing that he\'d be here, me and a friend decided today, wednesday, we\'d pay a visit to the King of Radio at the Hard Rock hotel here.
Directly after school, we jumped in his car and drove the thirty minutes to the Hard Rock Cafe. At first we were unsure that two 16 year olds could just roam around the casino or even sit and listen to the show. But it was worth a shot
Honestly it was my first time there, and I just walked around with roaming eyes on all the rock memorabilia that lined the walls. It was near showtime, 4:00 p.m., and when we entered the main room (Huge ass oval room with hundreds of people/slots/tables) we were greeted to a huge ass crowd of about 200. No chairs, all standing on their tiptoes to see as much as possible. Pissed that we didn\'t come earlier, me and my friend slowly slid are way as close as possible to see about 1/3 of the set.
4:02, the crowd cheers their nuts off and it\'s obvious that Howard and the gang just took their seats. The only clear view I got was of Robin, Arty and Jimmy Kimmel. So the show progressed on as usual, until the fun "interactive" stuff started. The first thing on the agenda, was giving a 2500 dollar bet to any girl in the audience that would french kiss Gary the Retard. And you wouldn\'t believe how hot the girls were that went up there to kiss him. 2 of them were like strippers, and the other 2 just normal fine ass chicks. Well Gary the Retard (looks like the Hunchback of Notre Dame) chooses the blonde stripper. And the blonde stripper totally tongues his throat out and the crowd was just puking. Me and my friend were around all these drunk college guys that were funny as hell. They kept screaming "Crack ASS WHORE!" and just typical obnoxius crap that was funny as balls.
So the blonde stripper finishes making out with Gary the Retard and she then has 2500 dollars to bet in blackjack in which she plays with Howard and the gang. Well the game is going good and seems like she is gonna lose her 2.5 grand until a 9 rolls out and she hits 21 on the spot. The crowd is pissed that she won being that obnoxious bimbo and gross ass that she is. And in the wave of all the boo\'s.... SHE TOTALLY FLASHES HER PLASTIC BOOBIES AT US!!!! Man I haven\'t seen bouncy objects like those since kindergarden!
Just amazing, and me, my friend, and our new college buddies were flipping out. So Howard goes to commercial and me and my friend decide to get a better view.
We slide past another set of people and now we have a view of half the set. We can see pretty much everyone now, and more of Howard. But the best part, these strippers from this strip joint, litterally, across the street from the Hard Rock, Club Paradise, ARE STANDING IN THESE LITTLE OUTFITS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US! So we\'re just checking them out the entire break till\' the show starts again. And the show goes on and on with loud drunken yells and the strippers dancing right in front of us. So it starts to get around 6:30 and everyone is getting wasted and we decide to bail, hey, we have school tomorrow.
So we are in the process of leaving when I spot Elephant Boy talking to some hot shot in a suit with a briefcase. I say, "Hold up I\'m gonna get an autograph from him". I overhear Elephant Boy talking to him and despite Elephant Boy\'s lousy articulation, I figured out he wanted to see The Amazing Jonathan, a magician, at the Golden Nugget. So the business man gives signs him a free pass and leaves, and I talk to Elephant Boy.
Me: "Hey man, can I get your autograph?"
Him: "Sure, I don\'t have a pen though"
(I scramble through my pockets get a pen, and an old check)
Him: "So you gonna write me a check?"
*I fake laugh*
Me: "No man, this is all I got."
*He studies the check*
Him: Master Sergeant? You in the army?
*He laughs*
*I fake laugh*
Me: "No, my dad\'s in the Air Force"
Him: "Oh, I thought so, your real small."
*He signs "Elephant Boy" "2/6/02" really ****ty on the back of check*
Him: "Blah...Blah... blah... (Insert alot of gibberish that I could not understand for 2 minutes straight)
*I continue to say "yeah" and nod my head*
*I finally decide to end this chit chat and say*
Me: "Well I gotta go."
Him: "Okay, take care"
Me: "Yeah, have fun, enjoy your X-box" (Inside joke)
*We both laugh*
Him: "blah...blah...."
So he leaves and I tell my friend what we were talking about and stuff. Then I notice that.....Elephant Boy..... left his FREE TICKET TO SEE THE AMAZING JONATHAN!!! So, with my friend going to get the car, I blast my way through the casino to give him his ticket. I shove through the crowd and talked to what I hoped was a producer and told him what had happened. So I gave the ticket to him and bailed.
and now I\'m here.
If you don\'t believe me, watch the show on E! next week, or listen to it tomorrow, and you\'ll see that the events that took place are going to happen and I\'m writing this post on the 6th. So unless I can travel to the future, this is true. Other things that happened, Arnold Schwarzenagger called to promote his movie, 3 people went up to prove who\'s life was more sad to win an 100,000 dollar bet, and a father and son interviewed to be paired with the mother/daughter prostitute team. In the 3 people thing to prove who\'s life was more sad, chick number 3 won it cuz\' her duaghter is dying of a brain tumor, guy number 2 was raped in prison and has to wear a diaper cuz\' he can\'t control his bowels, and girl number 1 lives in the corner of a garage with 3 kids and had a disturbing childhood.
If you guys want me to scan Elephant Boy\'s signature I will
Topic: ~My Adventure at the Hard Rock Cafe here and Howard Stern~ (Read 1070 times)