Sammy\'s random thread \'o crazyness

so yous ave chosun to read dis thread. well brave of yous. wot yous is about to check and read will leave yous shocked. or opefully a bit amused.

first i\'ll borrow yous da opportunity to get a resumé of three wicked books - and it won\'t take more than a few seconds! in da house we go:

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Ender\'s Game By Orson Scott Card

Ender:
The government let my parents conceive me because they hope to mold me into the ultimate military commander.

Government:
Ender, become the ultimate military commander and go defeat the buggers.

(He does.)

Ender:
Horror. I\'m only nine years old, and I have already eradicated an entire species. I thought it was a game, but it was for real. I will fret about this in the sequels.

THE END
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Dune By Frank Herbert

Frank Herbert:
I\'m lots smarter than you are. I challenge you to understand even one of my paragraphs!

Reader:
Gee, Frank Herbert is smart. I can\'t even find the plot.

THE END
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The Time Machine By H. G. Wells

The Time Traveller
I\'m going to travel ten scrillion years into the future. Maybe they\'ll know what my name is.

Weena
I\'m a member of the beautiful Eloi race. We\'re dumb as bricks.

A Morlock
Har. We Morlocks are ugly and mean. We have taken your time machine.

(The Time Traveller recovers the time machine and goes home.)

THE END
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And now to something completely different:
http://www.godhatesflags.com/


ok, so i can\'t be arsed to write anymore silly stuff. i\'ll be back lata.

PS. i really own al7 of you and u can"t do a damn thing aboUt it.. LLOL~~






(the above thread was completly useless and if you don\'t like it...... I don\'t really care)

What do you call a dog with no legs?

NOTHING!!! You can\'t call it, how\'s it gonna come if it don\'t have legs.

muaahhahahahahahah

Errrrrr........ Scared MUCH!!!!!!!!

Originally posted by serrano007
What do you call a dog with no legs?

NOTHING!!! You can\'t call it, how\'s it gonna come if it don\'t have legs.

muaahhahahahahahah

where do you find a frog with no legs???????


Wherever you left him!!!

bahahahahaha!

Originally posted by Kimahri


where do you find a frog with no legs???????


Wherever you left him!!!

bahahahahaha!

Lol, that was so stupid it was actually funny.

This woman with no arms and no legs is on a bench in the park next to a pond.  She is crying.  A dude walks by and stops to ask her why she\'s crying.

"I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never held a man\'s hand."  To which the dude responeded, "I\'ll hold your hand."  So next the woman says "I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never kissed a man."  To which the dude replied "I\'ll kiss you."  And so he did.

After this the woman was still crying.  The dude said "What\'s wrong?  I\'ve held your hand and kissed you."  The woman said "Yes, but I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never been screwed."

So the dude picks her up, throws her in the pond and says "There.  Now you\'re screwed."

Great jokes, I\'m gonna use the frog one.. hahahaha

[Kurt Angle]

This image reminds me of french lessons at college. We had a french woman to teach us and she was so thick. One guy asked her what the french for "spank my monkey" was, and she told him! Apparently the answer is "Frappe mon sange" or something similar to this.

[CHIZZY]

permette moi se jeter en les grande pommplemouuses.



don\'t know if that\'s right, but I think it means

"allow me to shoot on your large grapefruits..."

God, I hate the french....

Originally posted by EmperorRob
This woman with no arms and no legs is on a bench in the park next to a pond.  She is crying.  A dude walks by and stops to ask her why she\'s crying.

"I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never held a man\'s hand."  To which the dude responeded, "I\'ll hold your hand."  So next the woman says "I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never kissed a man."  To which the dude replied "I\'ll kiss you."  And so he did.

After this the woman was still crying.  The dude said "What\'s wrong?  I\'ve held your hand and kissed you."  The woman said "Yes, but I\'m almost 40 years old and I\'ve never been screwed."

So the dude picks her up, throws her in the pond and says "There.  Now you\'re screwed."

Not wanting to be picky, but how did he hold her hands when she had no arms??

Originally posted by Rick


Not wanting to be picky, but how did he hold her hands when she had no arms??

that was exactly what i was thinking:)

Lol, good call. I didn\'t even catch that.

And for you geekies out there, here\'s a picture of 4 gigs of RAM:

so thats what 4 gigs of ram looks like