god im pissed off, need something to make me smile. post jokes

some girl has pissed me off , dont want to get into it right now. Just if peep can post some funny stuff to make me forget. damn, and to late to go to pub

wow, you use grammar pretty well when you are pissed off.

[Living-In-Clip]

He does do better when pissed off - it\'s still not quite normal, but it is a marked improvement.

not a joke, but a happy movie

http://www.videogamedc.com/Pixeled_Parodies/Rise_Of_The_Mushroom_Kingdom_2/rise_of_the_mushroom_kingdom_2.html

A guy walks on the street and sees a beautiful young women with the most perfect breast. He stops her and says "Would you let me bite your breast for $100 ?" The women insulted replies "I am not one of those women" and takes off.

He runs around the block to see her again and cannot resist asking her "Would you let me bite your breast for $1000 ?" Again she takes off all insulted.

He has to see her again, this time he says" Would you let me bite your breast for $10,000 ?" She thinks about it for a minute and says "follow me in this dark alley." There she opens her blouse and he starts caressing them, grabbing them, kissing them. He then puts his face between them. A bit annoyed she says "Aren\'t you going to bite my breast?"

And the guy says" Nope, too expensive."

_________________________________________________


A man and his wife go to the site of their honeymoon for their 25th anniversary. As the couple is reflecting on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asks the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?"
The husband replies, "All I wanted to do was screw your brains out and suck your breasts dry."
"What are you thinking now?" the wife asks as she undresses.
The husband quickly replies: "It looks like I did a pretty good job."

Snatched @ another forum

.

[Kurt Angle]

what does a 747 have in common with a girl that dyes her hair blonde?

they both have a black box
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

An Italian, an Irishman and a Chinese fellow are hired at a
construction site.

The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the
Italian guy, "You\'re in charge of sweeping." To the Irishman he
says "You\'re in charge of shovelling." To the Chinese guy,
"You\'re in charge of supplies."

He then says "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect
you guys to make a dent in that there pile."

So the foreman goes away for a couple hours, but when he returns
the pile of sand is untouched.

He says to the Italian: "Why didn\'t you sweep any of it!?" The
Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I no gotta broom, an\' you
tella me dat de Chinese\'a guy supposa bringa da supplies, but he
disappear and I no finda him."

Then the foreman turns to the Irishman and asks why he didn\'t
shovel. The Irishman replies in his heavy brogue, "Aye, ye did
lad, but I counna get meself a shovel. Ye left the Chinese guy
in charge of supplies, but I counna fin\' him."

The foreman is really angry now, and storms off toward the pile
of sand looking for the Chinese guy.

Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of
sand and yells...

"Supplies" ! ! ! ! ! !

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thor, the Viking God of Thunder, and Odin, King Of The Gods are enjoying a flagon of mead in Valhalla, the Norse heaven.
Suddenly, Thor turns to Odin. "You know, my Lord," he says, thoughtfully thumbing his huge mystical hammer. "being a god is brilliant, but it\'s been a millennium since I had any sex."
Odin nodded and pondered for a while.
Raising his mighty head, he took pity on his melon-sacked subordinate.
"Go to Earth, 0 Thor," he replied. "Find thyself there what they call a \'lady of the night. Treat her to your manly pleasures."
Bowing gracefully, Thor retired and followed Odin\'s advice, before
returning the next night.
"My Lord," he said, grinning from ear to ear, "You were right - it was wonderful. We had passionate sex 37 times!"
"37 times?" exclaimed Odin. "That poor woman! Mere mortals cannot endure such treatment. You must go and apologize!"
Humbled, Thor went back down to earth and found the aforementioned prostitute.
"I\'m sorry about last night," he apologized. "But you see, I\'m Thor."
"You\'re Thor?" shouted the girl, "What about me? I can\'t even pith."

.

Hahahahaha! That\'s great!

he he, good job guys. keep them coming

.

[Kurt Angle]

:eek:

*fwap* *fwap* *fwap* *fwap* *fwap*

just read some of Vapors "I\'m pissed" threads, that\'ll make you feel better.

They\'re all gone!

But yeah that reminds me, anyone that may have a copy of any of the two "Ugh I\'m pissed threads..." can they PM it to me? I\'d like to re-read through it.

Thanks!

Oh, and what I meant by PM is not PM the thread but PM me in regards of getting me a copy via email or something.